Tuesday, September 29, 2009

State of Play here

So, to answer your question, yes, I feel better after having seen Chels. How can you not? I mean look at her. Photo from Sr. Prom, edited out Eric, boyfriend at the time. Will tuition get paid? Of course it will. Will I get a job soon? Of course I will. It's the feeling of 'ok my role as an employee is non-existent, my role as a mother has diminished greatly', and because I define myself so much with those two roles, I forget that there are other roles in my life. Will my life be like a half hour family sitcom where all gets resolved to the good in thirty minutes? No. it most definitely will not, but you know what, that's ok. I am one of the strongest lionesses I know. My daughter thinks I can move mountains, beat the crap out of people who upset me and mine (figuratively of course..), make the impossible, possible. Who am I to change her way of thinking? It's like that saying "Be the person your children think you are" My sister of course is another lioness, as is my mother in her own quiet way. I have raised, with the help of those two, another fierce woman. We should ALL be proud. She looked happy. Rush went well, she found three sororities she is interested in but two mainly are her focus. Saturday is BID day, until then they keep going to different events at the different houses. If she decides to do it, YAY, if not, that's ok too. I just want her to experience all that college has to offer academically as well as socially in her own way.
Treadmill tomorrow, back on track. I have to do it first thing in the morning or it's just not going to happen. I also have my interview at 10 so I think 7:30, Monsieur treadmill and I have a date.
I would like to see another 6/7 pounds gone in October, so here's to it!

Some of you may not realize it, but by and far this past year has been probably the worst year of my life on a personal level. I say that because me being out of work allowed me to be there for Chelsea in her last year of high school, around to get her ready to go off to college, available for a last minute up and down the East Coast road trip and I wouldn't have changed a thing if it meant losing all that. It also allowed me to be available when my father had a stroke and lost the ability to use his right hand and most of the use of his right side in general, thus making him unable to drive anywhere. At the same time, my mother also had health problems, on a much smaller scale, but problems nonetheless and I was able to assist with both of their physical therapy schedules, Dr.'s visits, grocery shopping, paying bills, etc. It was time well spent as well because my relationship with my parents, especially my father has not always been the best. This brought us closer and I found that my mother is quite awesome! On every other level however, including my own health, I was out with meningitis for 3 months, obviously financially and career wise, it has been disastrous. So, I give you the new mantra. Voila, not pretty but I just have to keep reminding myself... this too shall pass.

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