In the BROADest sense of the word...

See that face? That face is the face I make when I don't get my way, but not in a tantrum kind of way. The face that I make when things are Topsy turvy and I feel like I have no control over their outcome. It's also the face of determination, perseverance and is the nicest way I can say "Screw that, I'm DOING this." If you knew me back in the day, high school, after that some, you've more than likely been a recipient of that face. I don't do NO well. Eventually, though, it happens, things sort themselves out and I stop looking like that. It's Katherine Hepburn, a Vanity Fair shot. She was a broad, much in the way that Lauren Bacall, Kathleen Turner, Stockard Channing, Susan Sarandon, Rachel Weisz and Diane Lane are. Yes, those are my heroes, BROAD wise. They don't do things they don't believe in. THAT, my friends is the key. Where is the line you draw that says, 'yeah, no, not gonna happen.' What I love about being a broad is that most of the time I am on top of the balance that is strong and still feminine at the same time. I think strong women are a necessity and a wonder in this age. My generation birthed many. We are lucky, because the things we teach our children, nieces, and nephews will carry on. I am trying something, WWDD, "What would Diane do?" over the next few days, and see if it makes the difference in my dealings. I'm sure it will. When I feel confident, I can do ANYTHING, and I feel like the power that is the BROAD in me is overflowing today. The interview went so well. I was so pleased. I also applied for two other administrative positions within the company, so we'll see what happens.

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I'll tell you what Diane would do with the cleaning that needed to be done around my house. She would have made her kids pitch in and help. My kid is away. Master Bathroom, Dishwasher, Master Bedroom, you were overcome.

State of Play here

So, to answer your question, yes, I feel better after having seen Chels. How can you not? I mean look at her. Photo from Sr. Prom, edited out Eric, boyfriend at the time. Will tuition get paid? Of course it will. Will I get a job soon? Of course I will. It's the feeling of 'ok my role as an employee is non-existent, my role as a mother has diminished greatly', and because I define myself so much with those two roles, I forget that there are other roles in my life. Will my life be like a half hour family sitcom where all gets resolved to the good in thirty minutes? No. it most definitely will not, but you know what, that's ok. I am one of the strongest lionesses I know. My daughter thinks I can move mountains, beat the crap out of people who upset me and mine (figuratively of course..), make the impossible, possible. Who am I to change her way of thinking? It's like that saying "Be the person your children think you are" My sister of course is another lioness, as is my mother in her own quiet way. I have raised, with the help of those two, another fierce woman. We should ALL be proud. She looked happy. Rush went well, she found three sororities she is interested in but two mainly are her focus. Saturday is BID day, until then they keep going to different events at the different houses. If she decides to do it, YAY, if not, that's ok too. I just want her to experience all that college has to offer academically as well as socially in her own way.
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Treadmill tomorrow, back on track. I have to do it first thing in the morning or it's just not going to happen. I also have my interview at 10 so I think 7:30, Monsieur treadmill and I have a date.
I would like to see another 6/7 pounds gone in October, so here's to it!
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Some of you may not realize it, but by and far this past year has been probably the worst year of my life on a personal level. I say that because me being out of work allowed me to be there for Chelsea in her last year of high school, around to get her ready to go off to college, available for a last minute up and down the East Coast road trip and I wouldn't have changed a thing if it meant losing all that. It also allowed me to be available when my father had a stroke and lost the ability to use his right hand and most of the use of his right side in general, thus making him unable to drive anywhere. At the same time, my mother also had health problems, on a much smaller scale, but problems nonetheless and I was able to assist with both of their physical therapy schedules, Dr.'s visits, grocery shopping, paying bills, etc. It was time well spent as well because my relationship with my parents, especially my father has not always been the best. This brought us closer and I found that my mother is quite awesome! On every other level however, including my own health, I was out with meningitis for 3 months, obviously financially and career wise, it has been disastrous. So, I give you the new mantra. Voila, not pretty but I just have to keep reminding myself... this too shall pass.
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WARNING, yes you have been let into the pity party.

I too have become Uncomfortably Numb. Another friend says this is the equivalent of being a functioning alcoholic. Hullo, my name is Collette and I am a REALLY good comfortably numb person. Where's the 12-step for that? I feel like I'm going to throw up. My head is pounding, I am dizzy, and it's a nauseating numbness, not a dream state numbness that some people have. I have to drive an hour away to have lunch with, and be all lovely to, my daughter who is at Uni and unaware of the numbness. That is how it will remain. The last thing I need is to have her stressing out over me whilst trying to deal with all the other stuff at Uni. If she knew I was worried about the unemployment, the state of the bank account, the tuition, the (insert another worry - go ahead, you choose) then she wouldn't be able to concentrate on the prize at hand which of course, is her education. She's worked so hard to get where she is, I can't let me not working and the outcome of that affect her focus.

I'm not out to impress people with anything, I'm not about keeping up with the Jones's or BEING the Jones'. I don't think I ever have been. I just want to be able to pay my bills, give my child the education she deserves, and be able to go to the Doctor when I need to. It's not much to ask, really, it isn't. If I thought that God was an unforgiving God or a vengeful God, I would believe that this is payback for all the really horrible things I've done in my life and then it would be justifiable. I have to believe otherwise. I have to.

Leaving for lunch with Chelsea. I'll feel better later, promise.

Cooking? Do you mean bung it in the oven?, and Friends,

Yesterday my sister was in the kitchen making up a batch of stuff for her lunches/dinners next week. She is a fun cook, she chops and slices and dices and sautes till the house is brimming with the smells of homemade goodness. I don't even eat half the stuff she makes, but MY GOD, did the house smell yummy! I wish I was that adventurous in the kitchen. Oh sure, I can bake with the best of them, but actual cooking? I still don't have a hold on. My mother cooked until I was 13, then we had a cook from the time I was 13-15, then my mother cooked again, then 15-18 we had a cook. 18-onward, Stouffer's and Lean Cuisine and the odd days here and there I would attempt cooking, but for the most part, I was pre-packaged, add a salad sometimes, and get on with it girl. I'm going to try my hand at this cooking thing again. Last week's chili was fantabulous if I do say so myself and even though I'm only cooking for one, Chel's not home, L doesn't live with me, it will still be fun and think of all the leftovers, so I won't be out buying fast food.

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Sunday - It was a Sybil day. Dark and blustery one minute, sun shining like all get out the next. Time to get under covers and read a book. I would if I wasn't going to clean house when I get home, but I do hope this signals the beginning of real Fall here in FL. They say April and May constitutes rainy season. I just want some semblance of Fall.

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“To like many people spontaneously and without effort is perhaps the greatest of all sources of personal happiness.” I try and automatically give people I meet a clean slate. Benefit of the doubt that they will be awesomely nice people if you will. I have been bitten in the butt more often than not. Does this change my perspective on how to approach a new person, friend or acquaintance? No. I try and be a positive part of friend's lives. I figure we all have stuff going on that to us is major/big/stressful. Why add to the negativity? This doesn't always work with my own family though. I think that with family you feel safe and so the least bit of negativity may come out harsher because you feel safe to express it there. I am sincere in my hope for people to have BRILLIANT days. I am working on keeping things positive, even when surrounded by what, at the time seems like insurmountable odds. I hope that even those who I don't see as often as I would like due to some reason or another, realize that I still try and bring some light into their lives even if only via facebook, im's, texts or email. I am hopeful that the light they bring me shines back at them tenfold.

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Interview this morning went well. Wednesday I meet with the actual person I would be supporting, so that will be fun. Tomorrow, lunch with Chelsea, I'm taking her up an ethernet cord for her Mac. Today, Y'all have a BRILLIANT BRILLIANT day.

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Movietimes, Oliver, WHO ARE YOU?, The weigh it is...

Chels made it home Friday night, too late really for us to catch a flick so we decided to catch movies today. Saw "9" and "Julie and Julia". Both were good. I would have seen "9" even if it had gotten terrible reviews, because Elijah Wood is the main character. I would have seen "Julie and Julia" as well because I love Meryl Streep. I also got to spend the day with Chels. WIN WIN WIN :)
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You know it's time to rethink your friends when you get a text message that states " My time in FL is almost up as I will be at sea w/Royal Caribbean, Love to see everyone one more time before I leave. Free next Saturday, having a blowout at Backstage Billiards in LBV starts at 8 and we'll close it down", and you have no idea who sent it to you. All the numbers in my cell have names attached to them. I have so many friends who are performers and in hospitality in general, and people change cells all the time, so the confusion is understandable. Here's the thing though, someone took the time to invite me, I feel bad a)not knowing who it is and b)RSVP'ng to a blind number. I thought other friends would know something about it but no one seems to be saying that they will be at the event. I think we should show up blindly and hope for the best. That way, no one's feelings are hurt we didn't show and at the same time, I find out who the person is AND I get to play Pool, which I love to do. Lame, I know. Don't judge, it could happen to you.
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I am addicted to http://www.apartmenttherapy.com/ . I am jonezing to move out anyway and then top it off with all these ideas in one small site... argghh. Addicted I tell you!
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It's raining now, a gorgeous thick rain. Of course my mind thinks, rain, dark outside, why aren't you in bed?
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I haven't been blogging about it because it makes me sad, but I am waaaaay bigger than I want/should be. I have been making small steps to change that and to my delight, it's paying off. This week, I lost two pounds. No, it's not Biggest Loser material, but that makes a total of 6.2 pounds this month and I still have a few days left in the month. I'm happy that it's making a difference. It's not just about the treadmill, it's about the intake.

Limiting the crap and adding good. It's not rocket science, I really don't see why it's taken me this long to understand it. I'm not on program (Weight Watchers), I'm just using my head. Am I still going to have a Twistee Treat Butterscotch and Caramel Sundae when I want? You can bet on it. Am I going to beat myself up over it the next day? Not a chance. I have a goal in mind and a "carrot" to wave in front of me, as I do well when given incentives, so I foresee success.
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I don't know about you but Sunday is calling my name. Sundays here mean a leisurely wake up, an indulgent breakky and the paper. I savor the paper, and read almost every section except sports, because really, I don't care. At all. Unless of course it's College Basketball season. Go Duke. I have no affiliation educationally to Duke. It's all Christan Laetner's fault, just like my love for University of Maryland is Boomer Esiason's fault. I didn't graduate from either school. But I digress

Metal and hair, I mean really... what else is there? LOL

This morning I wake up and hear two things. 1) Sebastian Bach, (stock photo) you know him, "18 and Life," "I Remember You," the singer who kicks almost every other metal vocalist out the door, the guy who IS Skid Row? Yes, NOW you remember him. Well, he's going to be ion VH-1 Celebrity Fit Club. The man looked like he needed an intraveneous drip back in the day. I guess it hits us all at some point. 2) "Mmm-Bop" was on my radio, like as in Hanson. Time to change the station settings. Time to wonder if I should go back to bed. It's strange; I find my radio settings are starting to dial further up. I have some classic rock (think 70's), a mix (late 60's, 70's, 80's, 90's and today), Christian Contemporary (DC Talk, Michael W. Smith, Jars of Clay, Third Day, Barlow Girl, Jeremy Camp, etc.), talk radio, and a station that seems to play a lot of stuff Chels likes. Next car is coming equipped with Sirius or XM because I like the idea of having an ALL 80's station or Elvis 24/7 at my will (which, you'll be happy to hear, will NEVER happen, but it's nice to know I could make it happen if I wanted to).
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Treadmill: 30 minutes-defeated that machine -- YAY!
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I am half way through the Rubbermaid tub of papers to cull. It was cathartic throwing things away. Will do the rest tonight while I watch my guilty pleasure true crime shows... unless of course L pummels me to death with the remote to watch Mythbusters or a new Top Gear (you never know, it can happen...).
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Prepped the hair for the dyeing tomorrow. Friday I have two, count 'em, two interviews so I wanted the hair sorted prior. Friday is also when the Chels is coming home WHOOT WHOOT! Trust me when I tell you Loreal for True Brunettes (if indeed you ARE a brunette) is your best friend until you can actually get to your regular stylist for a dye job or highlights. This made my hair thicker, the highlights were like caramel, butterscotch and honey all rolled into my natural color and I was more than thrilled with the results. It usually runs in the $10-12 range, but with coupons (and come on, when DON'T I have coupons), and a good Target sale, I can, and in this case, did, get it for $6.99. Love, lurve, LUV it and recommend it to all. To the point where I would even say pay the retail $10-12 - it's worth it and so are you.

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Lita Ford (stock photo) is on my XM radio right this second, singing "Kiss Me Deadly." This is a fitting way to end the post, as we started with The Vox of Metal, Sebastian Bach. :)

Order and Light

Happy Fall Solstice!
The House of Blues, Orlando has two for 1 tickets, $10.13 plus tax, available to the The Psychedelic Furs/Happy Mondays show. As much as I know I can sit through and enjoy Richard Butler, I cannot at all enjoy aging bovver boy Shaun Ryder and because I don't know who is opening for who...I pass.
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Last night did a list of lists, (stock photo) ended up with 250 things I want to do before I die. I guess that means it's a bucket list. I'm sure there is more, but that was a great start. It was fun and things were in no apparent order and some things I can't do now due to financial concerns (set up a scholarship in Chel's name at FSC for single parent children who need financial aid) or because the people don't exist yet, (Grandchildren), but I am going to make a big run at the list. I mean I must have at least another 42 years I reckon, if not more as only the good die young.
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Chel comes home on Friday for the weekend. We live an hour away from the university so she felt it was just silly for me to drive up for parent's weekend. We'd rather be here and go to the movies and chill mother/daughter anyway. I'm excited to see her. Just got off the phone with her and she seems good except for roommate problems, cramped quarters will do that to you. If I had my way she would have gotten a larger room or more roommates, it's difficult when there's just two of you. Also, I'm going to have her go through her stuff and decide really what she wants to get rid of because I need to get started on this culling in the house.
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The treadmill, alas, did not happen. Other stuff is though. Those folders we bought at Target? Being utilized this evening. I am purging every slip of paper that is in a big old Rubbermaid tub and sorting it into HOUSE DECOR, TRAVEL, FASHION, PRESSIES, FINANCIAL, PHOTOGRAPHY, and FITNESS categories, and they each get a folder. I feel uber organized just looking at it all and I haven't even started the actual purge. I know it sounds ridiculous coming out of my mouth when I say it but "I can't create under these circumstances" or "I can't even think in here" is true when I have disorder around me visually. I'm not anal and I'm certainly not BREE from Desperate Housewives as far as the house being spotless, but I need order. This is a good start on it. Kicking away...

The ramblings, foodings, projects...

Roofers showed up this morning at 8:30 to finish up. I hope I get my house back before 5.
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“What a wonderful life I’ve had! I only wish I’d realized it sooner.” Colette
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Made Chili (stock photo-my memory card was over at moms house) over the weekend. Was very happy till I realized I had forgotten the green, red, and yellow pepper mix.. it still tasted amazing, just the right kick to it without melting my face off... love comfort food, I think the next project is 5 cheese mac and cheese.
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Target was having AMAZING clearance on some school supplies and although Chel is sorted, I needed some accordian files to corrall all the culled articles and or pressie ideas I liked, so L and I went (she to get Starbucks- it's our closest one and I to grab the files). I don't know how other people are able to file or organize their mags and or articles/pages they want to keep, but this seems to work for us. Walked out with 4 for $7.50 and she treated, so that was lovely of her! SO many other goregous things I wanted to pick up, but house shopping not on the agenda yet, so... back home we went.
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I start treadmilling again tomorrow. This is not something I am looking forward to. My other alternative is to give up bread and Diet Coke altogether. So you understand, then....
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Lunch will be Chili. Dinner will be Pasta Primavera, me thinks, with some gorgeous crusty artisan sourdough bread, salivating just thinking about it, now. I'm actually getting all these cravings out of my system becase as I said, tomorrow is D day for this tummy and it's evil mignons, my arms... and it's a lost cause... because now, I really AM quite hungry - Lunch it is...

House vs. Apartment

When you make the decision to live in a house as opposed to living in an apartment, there are likely things you have considered. You may have decided that you just cannot deal with the noise of feet above you at 6 in the morning, or that having to find parking near your actual building is getting to be a bit tedious. I think sometimes those feelings may override the ones that should be brought to your attention when you are thinking about a house. A house brings all sorts of other things to think and be bothered with like, lawn maintenance, I don't cut my lawn, a service does, but now that I'm not working, I can't afford to have him come as often as he used to and thus, my lawn is less than stellar. A house, especially one you choose to rent because you were only going to be there till after your daughter finished high school, has a landlord. Landlords are a strange duck. My particular one hasn't raised our rent in 4 years. I don't see him doing so, I think he's just so happy to have someone in the house in this economy. That said, this house leaves a lot to be desired. We recently had no dishwasher for a month while he was shopping around for one. My disposal is still broken. The roof began to leak in late July. It's just now mid September and roofers are here to fix it TODAY. Stock photo. The delay? The landlord was negotiating with insurance to pay for it. In the mean, I had tarp on my roof. My sister and I share the house and she for one doesn't want to move. Once I am working again and probably in about a year, I will be moving. It's time. I want to decorate my own place again, have parties again, etc. I could in this house, but it just doesn't feel like mine. I won't ever buy a house, been there, seen that, not interested. Even if it's an apartment or a condo I choose this next time, it's mine and SOMEONE else can deal with the roof and the lawn and all the silliness that is "estate maintenance".
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The Forces that listen and Chels

It was as if some unknown force heard me this morning... I arrived at the house to pick up mail and in a box was a lavender candle I had won and completely forgotten about. The smell when opening the box was overwhelming and just took me to a good place. So I couldn't go to Provence today, Provence came to me.... Steven Mitchell's painting is a good representation of where I felt I must have been when I opened the box. It was a good thing as well, because a few hours before Chelsea had called from University to say her car battery had died and that she was at the Autozone to get a new one but wanted to check in with me before she actually bought one to see what prices should be etc. I thought 2 things: 1) She is so much more mature than I was 18, already being at the shop, shook up a bit, but still had the wherewithal to get a jump from Safety Dept at school and then go to the shop and 2) She called me to get advice... so YAY for being Super Mommy. (I call myself that when my 18 year old still calls me because she misses me or needs me to give a hug etc...) This day found me in shambles, emotions ran high all day long be they good or bad, they were THERE BIG TIME.

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This evening I picked up a roll of film that I found and had dropped off at Walgreens. I haven't used film in so long and had NO IDEA what was going to be on this roll. I was surprised it was a roll from October 2005, a Halloween party that Chelsea's youth group at church had. She dressed up as a housewife, robe curlers in hair and all... it was just so strange to see her so young. It brought back good memories and then made me think of how proud I am of who she has become. I'm such a big glumph when it comes to her. Everything inside me wanted to drive up to Lakeland today and handle the whole battery thing for her, but I knew she could do it and she did. I will just take solace in the knowledge that I prepared her enough to take control of situations like that even if they do surprise her, she still can conquer whatever comes her way. This photo was from before Senior Prom. Got her at Lakeside, before Eric (the boyfriend at the time) and she went to The Tavern for Pre Prom Dinner. Lucky I am, I just need to keep reminding myself.

In a bed of warm

My horoscope today said to find or imagine myself in a field of purple. I can think of hardly anything better. Jennifer Vranes painting "Summer Shadows" feels like it would be a brilliant place to be. My horoscope also says it is a "Power day" for me... I don't feel powerful. At all. In any aspect of my life. I don't think people realize that being unemployed is just as much if not more stressful than working at a crap job, that being unemployed, you are busy even when you're not behind a desk all day. Here's the other thing, you feel powerless. It's hard for everyone in this economy, I know, so I'm not pity partying just me. Although the quiet and dark of my bed seems just lovely right now. So, today I welcome an opportunity to go lay on a blanket in the field of purple and let the sun hit my back.

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In other news, "Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle."-Philo-

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The shopping, the nostalgia, the rambling, oh my!

(image - catinsosa) knows what I mean about stretching that dollar! Target and Walgreens roundup today, not my best work, but it was a good day.

Armed with my trusty coupons, my ever present Diet Coke and $....

I won't bore you with the details of the two transactions, just that Walgreens- I walked out with $27.92 worth of stuff for $4.68. Target was not as great but I'm happy because I got some things I needed and HAIR COLOUR (oh yes, my friends, IT'S TIME). Walked out of Target with $25.02 worth of stuff for $11.88. All in all not a bad trip. The woman who checked me out at Customer Service in Target was so awesome, I even left a "customer appreciation" card for her manager to put in her file for when performance evaluations come up. Groceries tomorrow.

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I was feeling nostalgic the other day, I thought about how fun it would be to see FDR's production of Grease. I put the call out for any of my classmates who may have a copy of the show on VHS (as that's all there was back in the day, kiddies) to please let me know if they could copy it and ship it to me if paid for the duplication and shipping. So far only JF thinks his mom and dad may still have the old tape. I hope so. It'd be a shame if we all lost ours. Voila, Stockard Channing as Betty Rizzo. (Stock Studio photo) Given my druthers and perhaps a different path choosen, I would have hoped my foray into musical theatre/acting would have taken my 1/4 as far as that woman. I think she is a brilliant actress and as the First Lady on The West Wing she was outstanding. I joke with my own parents that if they weren't available, that Abbey and Jed Bartlett (Stockard Channing and Martin Sheen) would have been my parents of choosing.

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It's a dark quiet night here. I think it wants to rain and everything in me says snuggle up in bed and read a good book. I've decided that Chili needs to be made in the very near future. I LOVE chili. Giant grocery store in Maryland has the best chili, failing homemade of course. Wendy's when it's not all liquidy is good as well. Me, I like a variety of black, red beans, corn, peppers, garlic, oregano, chili powder, you know... the usual, but I also add a little bbq beans (shh. don't tell...)to it as well, just to get a smokier flavour. Some people like it with ground beef, I can have it either that way OR vegetarian. It's brilliant with cornbread. so yes, there will be Chili.

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Tomorrow - Groceries, the beginning of the media culling, OMG! I'm opening up the desk drawers that must never be opened (you know the one with all those bits and bobs we all accumulate throughout the year), if I find anything coolio, I'll let you know:) Till then!

and the New Year begins

BRILLIANT birthday weekend. L and I went to PSB on Friday night. I went movie crazy, crashed, and Sunday morning L and I went to Tampa and Sunday night Chels came home to surprise me and we went to dinner. Monday (the actual birthday) I had an interview at 9 that went swimmingly... washed bed linens, Thanks to natasha11 for the image.
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This is what I officially consider the New Year, break out a new notebook... those of you who know me, I'm never without my notebook(s). Time to color the hair again, start the treadmill routine again, I like to start the September clear. So, I have my shiny clean purple notebook and a fave pen, off to take over the world!

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Colin Farrell is procreating again - that can't be a bad thing.

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I'm sure someone more astute than Ally Sheedy said it first but she recently said "The only constant in my life is change. " I loved that and find it hits close to home.

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Fall is coming. I can't be happier. If I had my way, it would be September, October, November all year round... I don't care for the heat of Summer or the cold of Winter... so I'm kind of like baby bear of Goldilocks and the Three Bears... I want things "just right" and it's never more right than Fall as far as I'm concerned... Fall means plaid to me, wool, fires, slow cooker comfort food, all good things.

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Started updating the house. Took down a photo of Chelsea in Leicester Square taking photos of pigeons and put up a framed copy of a painting that states simply "I love you every day", put up some of my own photography, started really looking at books and videos that need culling. Much to do on the punch lists and why not start looking seriously at the lists now that September has come? Chels gifted me some Mexican heather and told me it supposedly sprouts like a madman, so I may have to repot it when it gets bigger but now it looks just fine in my also gifted purple pot on my desk. It's showing to be a lovely day :)

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Left to my own devices, I probably would...

The Pet Shop Boys show at House Of Blues, Orlando was amazing. Given the fact that my sister and I lived in London around the time they came out, the songs we loved were considered old school to the majority of the people in the pit, but we were up a level and dance and sing at the top of our lungs we all did.

Neil and Chris played almost every song I hoped they would. Heart, Left to my Own Devices, It's a Sin, West End Girls, Suburbia, Two Divided by Zero, Jealousy, New York City Boy, and a whole bunch of other songs we didn't know, but danced to anyway. They also played a cover of Viva La Vida (Coldplay) and it was AMAZING! All in all Neil and Chris played 1.5 hours (not bad for a 55 year old and a 54 year old respectively) and it was worth every penny.

Steals and Deals at the Super Target

Is there a better store than a Super Target? I don't think so... Not only can I get Isaac Mizrahi there, I can get groceries. In that vein and the fact that I am a coupon crazy, I went shopping.
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Bounce 2 month Dryer Bar(this way I don't buy dryer sheets) 2.24
4 Tide 2x Ultra Single Packs (1 load a piece)4 x 97cents 3.88
4 Reeces Peanut Butter cup 2 in a pack (2 dark choc, 2 Milk) 2.08
2 Loaves of Archer Farms Artisan Sourdough Bread 1.98
5 Archer Farms Artisan baguettes 4.95
2 Healthy Choice Frozen Meals 2.04 each 4.08
1 Can of Edge Infused Shave Gel 2.99
2 RENU eye lubricants for contact lenses 2.64 each 5.28

Total $27.48 before coupons

Bounce Target Coupon 1.50
Bounce Manufacturer Coupon 1.00
4 Tide Mfc 1.oo each 4.00
2 Reeces .52 mfc 1.04
2 Reeces .54 mfc 1.08
7 Artisan Farms Target Coupons 6.93
2 Healthy Choice Mfc 2.00 each 4.00
1 Edge Infused Mfc 2.99 2.99
2 RENU Mfc. 2.00 each 4.00 Total of Coupons used $26.54

Total after Coupons = $.94
Tax .78
Total Paid to Target = $1.72 for $27.48 worth of groceries.

It was a good trip :) Now, off to get ready for The Pet Shop Boys concert tonight.

The taming of the Shrew

Went to last job and picked up paycheck. Woman made me wait 1/2 an hour even though I had spoken to her on Tuesday and we agreed I would come by today AT 10 to pick it up. She said "Oh, I'd forgotten all about you..." I replied "Well, I'm here now and you've known I was coming all week and if you trusted your administrative staff to do the fantastic job that they do without you screaming at them all the time, your admin could have told you I was on your calander. I'll be here in the lobby while you cut my check." SHREW. As I was leaving, I did speak to coworkers and gave them blessings so they could get through the rest of the day.. This woman was HORRIFIC to deal with micromanaging, shrill, demeaning, etc... that and the fact that after hiring me for a week decided she couldn't fund the position... Yes, I suppose it's a blessing disguise I'm not still there.

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Off to Target - I have a boatload of coupons that will get me most of the stuff for FREE and you know I love me some FREE :)

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ETA: I really am NOT a horrible person like I was in that office today but the way this woman said it "Oh....I'd forgotten all about YOOOOOOUUUUUU..." in that condescending way... I just couldn't let that slide.

Almost The Birthday Weekend

Got the phone call from Apple One, who is the employment agency I am trying to get work from, that I need to meet with the client on Monday at 9, instead of tomorrow at 10, which works as I have to go to the last job and pick up my check from that one tomorrow. Problem then? I was all stoked about the interview Friday and now I have the whole weekend to stew about it. That and my birthday is Monday, so plans to go to Walt Disney World - Magic Kingdom are shot.

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So, speaking of the birthday weekend... Friday night, my sister, (we'll call her L) and I are seeing THE PET SHOP BOYS at HOB. In the 80's, my sister and Neil (the singer, yes, the one yawning, there...thanks to the record company for such a great photo on the album cover!)had a meeting of the minds on a tube ride in London. She immediately recognized him, he acknowledged that she recognized him and she smiled at him and left him to be. This also happend in Harrods with George Michael of WHAM - my sister - she's like a magnet, I don't know.... This is the way of my sister. She doesn't want bubbles burst. I understand that. You don't want to find out that in real life that people you respect musically are real tools. I respect Mel Gibson as an actor and his choices in roles and genres. But at the end of the day, he's a tool. So no bubble burst, let's just be happy for the music. I mean come on, when's the next time Neil and Chris are going to come to HOB Orlando? Glad we got tickets before Neil's vanity got the best of him...
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Speaking of the $$$$ that I am picking up on Friday, almost 90% of it is going to Chel's tuition bill. The bill itself is only $1600, but I just don't have it. I have been picking at the balance since we got the bill late July but I still have a big chunk of it still to go and live in fear that the college will pull her earnings from her part time job as a lifeguard to go towards the tuition as opposed to her using it for you know, LIVING? I will be the first person to tell you I was not anywhere as near as prepared as I should have been and now I'm paying the price. The other 10%? That would be Groceries.

Clean Slate

September 9, 2009 marks an important end ... and a beginning. This is what numerologists and astrologists are saying. Apparently, This is the number of completion and finality, but 9 is also the number of sympathy, love, selfless sacrifice and morality. OK then. I'm not a hard core astrology follower but I'll have a look to see whats up now and then. I'm going into this month with positive thoughts that there will be a turn around in a few different areas, if the number 9 wants to come along for that ride, more power to him :)

My horoscope on this apparently significant day says I'm supposed to JUST DO IT, stop talking about it... whatever IT is. Do what’s really important and then keep going. See it through to the end. I know what IT is, I think we all do down deep, we just don't know how to start, or are afraid, or just don't think we can do it. Well, I suppose today, I'll listen to what the oracles have to say, who knows, it can't hurt right? I may be pleasantly surprised where the day, week, rest of the month takes me.

I look forward to the rest of this month like a child waiting on the ice cream truck. It has a lot of potential. What I do with it I guess is how it will grow or fall.

This list is really just for my own good - if I put things in writing I tend to do them with resolve as opposed to just putting them on a back burner.

To do before September is over: Clean Slate!
Get a day job Purge bookshelves Purge CD's
Purge clothes Start treadmill again 3x week
Get back on Points program Purge the Eeyores.
I think that's a large enough list of goals. I have another 22 days - 3 weeks- to accomplish this, I have every faith in me.

Fear and Loathing in the Produce aisle.

I just found out some of my fave seasonal fruits and veggies are in!

Seasonal Fruits and Vegetables for September: Apples, Blueberries, Broccoli, Cabbage, Carrots, Cauliflower, Cucumber, Garlic, Leeks, Lettuce, New Potatoes, Spinach, Squash, Sweet Corn, of an abundance of freshness! Our local Farmer's Market is every Sunday, but doesn't really get into full swing until late September, early October, I think I'll start taking a looksee soon.

I don't care for many veg and find it difficult to eat them alone, so other than soups, salads and vegetarian lasagna or pasta dishes, as a whole, veg escapes me. I wish it wasn't like that so I am making an effort (ok, so it's really mainly for my waistline) to incorporate more veg in to the diet.

Kicking away, Col

Won't you be my neighbour?

Come on in, the gate's open. Welcome to the craziness. I have chocolate cake :) Get to know me a little It's not complicated. I'm a foreign service brat, parents traveled here there and everywhere, was in Panama at 6 weeks old, graduated Jr. High in Madrid, Spain; High School in Lima, Peru; lived in London for a few years after that, California, Maryland and now I'm based in Florida. I don't require much. I'm addicted to Diet Coke and I love Orange Popsicles.

The above said child. 18 and at Florida Southern College, studying Biology/Pre-Med. I am trying to get her to think about how to bring Forensic Psychology in there as a minor as she would be brilliant at that, but she wants to work in The Medical Examiner's office (a la Dr. G). Kids, there's no talking to them.

A theatre and band kid throughout her whole high school career, she decided that she wanted the "whole high school experience" her Sr. year and therefore dropped most of her Theatre classes and took up Swimming. Good thing she did because now she lifeguards at the University pool, making some money for herself. You go girl!

She comes home every two weeks or so, (we're an hour away from the college), I think more for me than for her, but I'm not complaining.
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One of my obsessions. Sleeping Beauty (Princess Aurora or Briar Rose- whatever you want to call her) and Prince Phillip at Magic Kingdom, Walt Disney World. I'm thinking about getting a shirt made up that says "PRINCE PHILLIP'S BIT ON THE SIDE" - how do you think that would go down? We live here in Florida, so you'd think I'd have a season pass. I don't but should. I love all things Sleeping Beauty related. I also love WDW :)

This is my passion. I am no more at home than when I am with camera in hand. There is a lot I want to express but wanted to at least give some insight to me.

I love Black and White photography and primarily use it in my portraiture. I shoot digital now and miss the hell out of proper film, but as I don't have a darkroom built in the house, the cost to print, develop etc. can get insane especially as I shoot SO many photos in a sitting. I love to shoot people but have started shooting architecture as well.

Performance is always a fun thing to shoot. I get to see artists I love and they, for the most part, have been happy with the results. It's a win win.

Kicking away, Col

As it was in the Beginning - Live and Create Light

Live and Create Light.

Pretty intimidating to start out like that, I'd like to think that I can do that on a daily basis. That the life that I live and try to create is giving light to great things. It's a heavy task sometimes.The writer Collete was inspiring and her work relative, she's my namesake and I can only hope to someday be a 1/3rd as carefree as she was. I'm not working a full time job right now (got laid off in November 2007), my photography business - Pocketful of Poses - has been slow, mostly because my head has been focused on getting my 18 year old - Chelsea - in college, but I can't use that as an excuse anymore, she's a month in and by all accounts is doing just fine thank you. So why am I feeling creatively and professionally stagnant?

I have my health for the most part (need to lose a few pounds - but don't we all?), my extended family is doing well. My 42nd birthday is in 6 days ( I know, I don't look a day over 36, right? - LOL ), I have accomplished 3 or 4 things on my list of things to do before I am 45, so I still have some time, but this is a strange feeling and it's getting old quick. So, on to better things This is my first post, it's going to be a journey, but then life always is and

"nothing worth having comes without some
kind of fight, got to kick at the darkness till it bleeds daylight" -
Cockburn

Kicking away - Col