Live and Create Light

Monday Morning you sure look fine...The Dog Days of Summer

2010-07-19T08:29:00.000-04:00

The Dog Days of Summer
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It's automatic, it's hydromatic, no, it's LISTOMATIC - to do this next month
Take Chel out for her birthday
Put lawn service on hold
Call FSC Financial AId to get Chel's Fall Tuition reviewed
Send cards
Package up Goodwill stuff, take it down there
Call Fee
Decide on which 2 of the 3 HOB shows in September are the most important to me
- Citizen Cope 9/11, James 9/21, The Black Crowes 9/22,
Get tix for the Joshua Radin/Script show on 10/29
Get fares for mom's trip to MD
Set up initial appt at Cele Health
Clear out office
Set up website come hell or high water
Set up order for business cards
Go down to Mother Falcon with logo and price out shirts etc.
Oh, yeah... go to the day job....
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The prodigal son, Mike, texted me the other night, in bits and pieces of Boondock Saintisms. It was a good laugh trying to have the coversation in just quotes from Boondocks. I miss him. He's working, and coming home soon (3-4 weeks).
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Michael Fassbender is in X-Men as young Magneto -- THAT? Makes me beyond happy :)
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Matt Mackelcan show at House of Blues with Corey Smith was great, Matt was in fine form, dancing around with the guitar, in great voice, met the new band members seem like fine fellows, great musicians, how can I go wrong? Was only allowed to shoot the first three songs, so not a lot of shots taken, but next show is at a normal bar with no photographer time limits, so I'll take a ton there. Road Trip to the Windjammer soon.
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Tomorrow is 2nd shoot with this new talent Justin. Should be interesting, scouted some new locations I may use in this instance so looking forward to that. Cameron and Maddie will be shooting soon as well, they always give quality even when goofing around. Cam, David, Justin, Mike and maybe Josh(when and if he comes home) have a shoot in August, guys doing guy stuff...
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Real update later - popping in before BAZINGA! Hope all is well. In the mean, have a brilliant brilliant.

The Highland way.. oh... and the bliss that is Sonic

2010-06-26T10:23:00.008-04:00

Trying keep the zen that is this picture, but it is getting increasingly more difficult.
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I had a full post and we lost power - the trials of blogging here at work...
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Last night found out that Pudge Rodriquez is STILL in baseball, go you Mr. Man! I also found out that Chipper Jones is retiring. Way to make me feel ancient Chipper! I was there when you were an infant who had just made it to the big show and now this?! God almighty, time flies!
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You know what else I found out? Winnie the Pooh and his friends (yes, THE REAL POOH BEAR, not disney pooh, not classic pooh,)all live at the New York Public library. Yet another reason to visit the fine city again. (Besides seeing Daniel Cole and the Mrs.)
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Something happened this week that has put a full on STOP to plans on a grand scale, affecting every part of our lives. It's not our fault either, it's just a bitch of a situation. I HATE it when things I have absolutely no control over can just turn life and plans upside indiscriminately. Not that my plans were grand, but they were still plans. But we'll do what we do, fight hard, survive, live (the Highland way...)and this we will get through. I'm just over this and some other things and a renovation on everything/one/place is in the works soon, methinks.
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On a good note, my father's eye surgery went well and he is expected to be able to go back to VA the 2nd week of July barring anything coming up bad at the follow up on Monday.
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The photography is good. I have shoots scheduled, locations scouted, new models booked, a wedding booked, pregnancy shoot booked, layout for the book drafted up,the first round of Proust questionnaires are out, waiting on responses on those for the book, and will be sending out the 2nd round on Tuesday or Weds. The process is a long one, but I am excited about seeing the finished product. New business cards, photocards and branding design done, just need to be ordered. At some point, maybe after the daughter is finished with University, the photography can be more income producing because I might be able to devote FT hours to it as opposed to 1/4 time that I am able to now. I am aiming to have that balance be 50/50 by years end. We'll see how everything pands out. Till the the day job stays.
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Russell Crowe has signed to be in a big screen version of The Equalizer, http://latimesblogs.latimes.com/movies/2010/06/equalizer-remake-russell-crowe-woodward.html -- I wasn't a huge fan of the show, but if Russell is involved, I'll give the movie a chance.
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I recently has SONIC for the first time ever. Needless to say, I am hooked. I have never in my life, had a better bacon sammy. I don't do tomato's so my BLT is a BL sandwich and this was amazing, texas toast, thick cut brown to a crisp bacon, no visible fate, it was AMAZING, paired with my strawberry slushy thing they do, I was in heaven. How is it possible I had never had this before I don't even know. I can assure you, I will be a frequent guest :)
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Don’t Be Afraid to Re-Evaluate and link love

2010-05-16T08:20:00.008-04:00

NEW MANTRA --- Concentrate your hopeful attitude on a positive outcome and Don’t Be Afraid to Re-Evaluate
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Often times, I am asked by various friends how I have coupons for so many things. Well besides the fact that I am the crazy coupon woman, I also am a member of various quality coupon sites and rewards programs. I am happy to start sharing those programs here. Today is VOCALPOINT. It is free to sign up and free to participate. http://www.vocalpoint.com//index.html I receive an email from VOCALPOINT every week or so and give my opinion on products I have tried or the emails ask me if I want to try some product and they send said product out and I review said product. I'm not getting paid to do that. However, more often than not, that product comes with coupons. Sometimes even a coupon for the product FREE, and coupons for $1 or $2 off to give out to friends. I enjoy programs like this, my mailbox is always full, of these types of samples, products to try, so if you are interested, VOCALPOINT is a good place to get your feet wet.
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http://www.kraftfirsttaste.com is another good place to start. Kraft offers up samples and high value coupons for all sorts of their products. Some products are sent to your home and others you can just print out the coupons and get them at the store and try them. I always give feedback as a)I'm an opinionated broad and b)they appreciate it and it helps the marketing people know what people want in future products and coupon offerings. Again - it's free to sign up and participate.
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FYI - I am having serious wanderlust, I dreamt last night I was walking through fields of green and then on the pier of some lake/ocean/random body of water (neither of which I am anywhere near, what with being landlocked in the this suburban scene) and I woke up thinking it must have been North or South Carolina, which i have no real connection with barring my paternal grandmother (whom I am not close to) still lives there and an ex boyfriend (amicable split - I know, you can't believe it right?)used to live there. I YEARN YEARN to get moving. I stayed in MD for 10 years -- but I also traveled to Germany during that time and many day trips here and there, I am going on 6 years here, so I am not surprised this feeling is kicking in. It's quite dangerous, as my motto has always been 'If I'm not happy I'm gone', in pretty much every aspect of my life. It's not that I'm not happy, I just need to see new faces, new places, be away for a while, Chel is still in school at FSC, so I'm not going anywhere permanently until later, but I can assure you I will be moving, even if it's just to a new house or a new neighbourhood. Chelsea must also be feeling it because she just sent me a text that said "I want to emigrate back to England somedaaaayyyy" I smiled and sent back a text "ah, yes, but TODAY, is not that day" (She still has 3 more years of University left here in FL). I can also assure you that I will be taking more time to travel even if it;s just day/weekend trips, because otherwise one day we'll wake up and just get in the car and as my ever talented friend Matt Mackelcan sings "I'll just drive... down on 95...."
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nikoretro,flickr -- THAT? made me happier than you know - I LOVE lurve Luv blue cheese!
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Boondock Saints Prayer as best I can figure - in Irish - (again, really only for my own knowledge) ~ Agus beimid inár n-aoirí ar do shonsa, a Thiarna, ar do shonsa.
Tá cumhacht tagtha anuas ó do lámh,
ionas go gcomhlíonadh ár gcosa do thoil go tapaidh.
Sruthóimid ar aghaidh mar abhainn chugat
Agus plódaithe le hanamacha a bheidh sí go deo.

In ainm an Athar, agus an Mhic, agus an Spioraid Naomh
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Speaking of that - This man makes me laugh till I cry http://www.billyconnolly.com/
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It's been lovely - see you soon :) Til Then have a Brilliant Brilliant

There’s no finish line. Link Love, Movietimes,

2010-05-13T23:01:00.005-04:00

Am looking for some new music to put on some mix cds for an upcoming road trip to NC. Any suggestions greatly appreciated.
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"What’s something you know now about happiness that you didn’t know when you were 18 years old?" asked Gretchen Rubin. "There’s no finish line." replied Larry Smith - Smith Magazine -- THAT? Probably the biggest thing I have learned in my 25 years since becoming an "adult". Every time I think that I have a handle on it - it turns out I don't. I'm not sure that any of us ever will. That said, in the words of my friend Cameron Ivey - "Without the fright, standing on a line, I might as well call it a night." I'm tired of running the marathon - where's the finish line? Is it after your children leave the nest? After your 50th birthday? When you are made a Mgr at your job? When you have a cool Million in the bank? When? Anybody know- please bring me on board with an answer, otherwise I'm going with there just isn't one, we keep pushing on.
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I never tire of this and often listen just to get some french in.. AND THE CROCODILE and HIPPOPOTAMU!! OH MY!
http://www.i-am-bored.com/bored_link.cfm?link_id=35694
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I am in love with these two songs- Matt MacKelcan's "Drive" http://www.myspace.com/mattmackelcan
and "Black Summer" by The Country Slashers. http://www.myspace.com/countryslashers
They are on rotate right now. Mind you, I love all of Matt's stuff and Jason's voice gives me chills, so anything they play is great. If you're looking for new music to get into, I highly recommend both bands.
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I'm a big Bass girl, it's Lou's fault, he knows, but anyhoo--- I highly recommend this man and his brilliant fingers... James McKeever http://www.myspace.com/jamesbeadg5 Check out his player - great stuff. If you're a purist, "Blues for Roger" is gorgeous.
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Ian McKellan is turning 71 on the 28th of this month. 71. I truly truly hope we get back to London and I get to meet him before anything happens. It astounds me that he has done so much in the time given. I only have a few OMG! moments when it comes to celebrities, but it's McKellan. I won't rest till I do.
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Just for fun: and part of my continuing I love....

Small things I rely on constantly:
1. Tweezers. I have used mine to the point where you can't see the brand name on the side. Love mine!
2. Baggies. I carry at least one in my purse all the time, change, ink cartridges, eye shadow brushes, who knows, but it's all contained in a baggie.
3. Pens. Papermate Write Bros. Medium tip Black Ink.
4. Scissors. In the bathroom, in the kitchen, on the desk, I use them almost 2x a day every day
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LCL PHOTOGRAPHY - The first round of Proust questionnaires will be going out on Tuesday, please get them back as soon as you can, so I can start getting the soft draft set up. Thanks
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I love movies so I leave you with a movie meme :
1. Name a movie that you have seen more than 10 times: Boondock Saints, Master and Commander, The Far Side of the World; Braveheart, Rob Roy, The Notebook, The Lord of The Rings Trilogy, and The Empire Strikes Back, The Mummy Trilogy, The Bourne Trilogy, should I go on?

2. Name a movie that you've seen multiple times in a theatre: The Lord of The Rings Trilogy, Master and Commander, Jay and Silent Bob Strike back

3. Name an actor that would make you more inclined to see a movie: Ed Burns, Liam Neeson, Norman Reedus, Viggo Mortenson, Sean Bean, Sean Patrick Flannery, Ryan Gosling, Mel Gibson, Russell Crowe and Kurt Russell

4. Name an actor that would make you less likely to see a movie: Tom Cruise, Jim Carrey,

5. Name a movie that you can quote from: SEE ANY of the above movies

6. Name a movie musical that you know all the lyrics to all the songs: 0: I don't know ALL the lyrics to any musical except Les Miz and the movie they made for it was not a musical.

7. Name a movie that you have been known to sing along with: The Sound of Music

8. Name a movie that you would recommend everyone see: See all of the above movies

9. Name a movie that you own: See all of the above movies some I own all of these listed: theatrical version, director's version, multiple copies of each

10. Name an actor that launched his/her entertainment career in another medium but who has surprised you with his/her acting chops: Harry Connick Jr.

11. Have you ever seen a movie in a drive-in?: Yes

12. Ever made out in a movie?: Yes

13. Name a movie that you keep meaning to see but just haven't gotten around to it: Seven Pounds

14. Ever walked out of a movie?: twice I think

15. Name a movie that made you cry in the theatre - oh I don't know, I get very involved in film so probably a few

16. Popcorn?: About 10% of the time, not a big popcorn lover

17. How often do you go to the movies?: Maybe 20x a year. I wish I went more, I love the movies

18. What's the last movie you saw in the theater?: A Death in the family (The Chris Rock/Tracy Morgan thing)an America remake of the orig English film

19. What is your favorite/preferred genre of movie?: drama, then comedy

20. What was the first movie you remember seeing in the theater?: The very first movie I saw was TONY ROME, with Frank Sinitra and Jill St. John. I was 6 months old. The first one I remember seeing was a SINBAD movie (Sinbad the pirate explorer fighting a cyclopsy snake thing, I remember Medusa being in it)with my uncle. It was a matinee.
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Have a brilliant brilliant

whisper to a scream

2010-05-08T09:53:00.009-04:00

The other night on the drive home, radio station played its "Friday night 80's stuff, asked for requests, ever hopeful I asked for Dramarama - Anything Anything or Last Cigarette, completely not expecting to get what I wanted, and indeed, dj did not have... hang the dj.... oh wait, that's a whole 'nother song....ANYWAY - he did play "Whisper to a Scream" by Icicle Works. That made me very happy, think about it when is the last time you heard that song... and of course, now I'm like this is why I need an IPOD, all these old songs that I keep hearing, and don't have in my collection. I am probably the only one friend you have that doesn't have an IPOD. My L and other friends always just make me mix cd's of things they think I'd like. Should I get an Ipod? I do LOVE my music. Thoughts?
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Work keeps making me change my password every two or 3 months, and I'm not allowed to use any of my past ten passwords. Screwed, because I sit there attempting a bajillion times to log on using last time's password. This is Lou's and JWW's fault. :)
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Had dinner with chicklet last night, she moves into summer dorms today, summer classes start on Monday and financial aid awards haven't hit her account yet, so of course I'm still on edge. I hate not knowing what my bottom line is on things. I'm all about the numbers - can handle anything as long as I know what it is I'm supposed to be looking at bottom line wise, but until that award hits, I have no idea what to budget for. Hate that. On a good note, her manager at the new job likes her and he is happy with her progress. She still has the on-site campus daycare job that she is probably still going to do in June on top of the Panera job and her one class a month. Busy girl, but that will help her with some spending money :)
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Looking forward to going to South Carolina end of May to see a friend, Matt MacKelcan play a show with Carbon Leaf. I stopped promoting and help book bands ages ago as it was just taking too much out of me, what with dayjob, the photography, and family life. It was fun and I enjoyed helping musician friends do their thing, but it was just too much at once. I still support local music and always will, I just can't be physically there as often as I'd like. Priorities change, but it doesn't mean you like people less or don't support their efforts as much, I wish more people understood that.
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Did my hair on Wednesday, am pleased with it, no pics up this time, because I was just plain lazy.
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My Netflix queue has exploded, mainly due to the fact that I have tried to find all of Norman Reedus' main work. he has some off the wall indie stuff that I am sure is out there, but NF hasn't picked up yet - but also am interested in his directorial efforts - go to www.bigbaldhead.com if you're interested in either Norman or his films/directorial efforts.
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EXPLAIN this to me someone? PLEASE? Where is the beauty in these god awful ugly shoes and those like them and why do you continue to pay the ridiculous house payments to own them? Thank you.
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for those other Norm and Sean/ Murphy and Connor/BDS fans out there

THIS? makes me laugh!
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Going to see "Babies" this next week, I think I also want to see Iron Man, but only for Downey Jr and Sam Rockwell, I love Rockwell - I recommend everything he has ever been in but especially this last film Chelsea and I saw together with him in "Moon", it's good stuff. http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1182345/
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I wanna hold your hand...

2010-04-30T15:55:00.000-04:00

There are days, and mind you, they don't happen often, but there are days that I miss being up north. Miss the first snow, the fireplace, the wind, the crunch of the Fall leaves under my boots. We had NOAH rain the other night and it was intense and it just reminded me how nice it was to be a fireplace owenr. I live in Florida now where the need for a fireplace is NIL. So, yes, missing the Fall in MD a bit. Come on Fall...
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http://www.etsy.com/shop/yasminemol is a shop I will be spending money at in the future. I am interested in getting Chel's picture done. We already have a charcoal of her when she was young and I'd like one now as a comparison shot to put side by side. I think Yasmine's fab!
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http://www.theworkingproof.com/user/page?dv=1&page_name=index.html -- also a great organization and will be getting both my money and my work as well.
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Took my car in for the recall notice on the cracked fuel pump and indeed, I had one, $42.00 later (filled up gas tank) and we were on our way. It's a good thing it was covered because Lord knows I didn't have $800 just lying around to get it fixed.
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Found out I won a signed Tampa Bay Bucs jersey. Apparantly signed by a major player Rhonde Barber, a co worker asked to buy it off me. The funny thing is... I don't even like football all that much - I do watch some but not like baseball. Giving it to my father for one of his Christmas pressies.
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Had lunch with the chicklet the other day, it was nice as always, she held my hand as we were crossing streets. I tell you this because she NEVER and I do mean never, holds my hand. She'll hold my mother's, my sister's, sometimes even my dad's but she doesn't ever hold mine. My heart almost exploded when she did it. I literally do not know of a mother and daughter who are closer than we are, but that's just something she stopped doing with me when she was about 9.
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Really this is just here because I hadn't posted any photography really in a while. I am hoping to have some portraiture shoots in the next month, we'll see, but in the mean, I love that shot of Josh Wilson.
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FREE Comic Book Day: Saturday, May 1st, you can snag a FREE Comic Book at participating comic book shops across North America and around the world; be sure to check with your local shop for their participation and rules.
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7 Things wot r awesome! Farmer Collette

2010-04-25T08:01:00.005-04:00

7 Things wot r awesome this week :):
1)I got to have dinner with my baby girl last night. Nothing fancy, just Friday's and talking and laughing and talking. She's only here for last night and today. A friend's baby shower and then she's back at school for finals week. After that she'll be staying on at a friend's house so she can attend her Sr. sister's graduation and then she is back in residence halls for Summer session, which she is taking to get some required courses out of the way while she is working at Panera and the day care center on site at school. Wow to be 18 again, well, almost 19, and have that kind of energy and determination.
2)Dogs in cars with their heads hanging out the windows, tongues a flappin in the breeze. It's almost as if they are smiling :)
3)The fact that I petted a gopher turtle this weekend, and the fact that I didn't run over a armadillo making his way across one of our busier back streets late last night.
4)I am employed.
5)The Sunday paper and all the ads and coupon inserts that come with it.
6)Helping women who are old enough to be my grandmother program their remote control so that the cable AND the tv turn on and off at the same time and being told I am a "computer guru' because of it. LOL
7)The sun shining through work windows reminding me that even though I am in here, the world is lovely and bright this fine Sunday morning.
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This evening is grocery shopping - my cart full of produce. Do you ever get to that point where you are literally craving nothing but veg and fruit? Cold, crisp, wet fresh produce? It only hits me every once in a while, but when it does, I have to run and take advantage of the feeling. My sister has planted that great container garden, cucumbers, peppers, spices, tomatoes, three different kinds of lettuce, and it's yummo lettuce, I can't wait for the cucs to start coming in. So, tonight me and the cucumbers, canteloupe and leafy greens are having a party!
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This week is going to be busy - GBC in the house, the focus is the desk/files/storage bins and my daughter's bedroom. That itself is going to be the feat, if I can get that done, it will be a productive week. I am also taking the car in for a fuel leak that Volvo has recalled for, so no cost repair - woohoo! Various and sundry errands with the mother/sister and maybe a day of movies for me. Looking forward to it.
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My reunion was last week, and although I was unable to attend (LIMA, PERU Class of 1985), I enjoyed looking at all the pictures everyone posted on their various facebooks/blogs etc. We had a GOOD LOOKING class, and damn didn't most of us just get better with age. Everyone looked like they had an absolute blast and I wouldn't have expected anything less than that from us. Next time, time and resources permitting I'll attend.
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Bringing it back slowly but surely......

2010-04-18T20:25:00.000-04:00

Life is rich, life is rich if we live through it's experiences. So much to learn. If ignorance is bliss my love, I never would forget what I knew when I was young, man I know I can't hold onto April drops of rain, and then come what may, but it's hard to look, hard to look, away... -Carbon Leaf
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My sister has been making bookshelves (well putting them together), she does love her books. I thought about collections today and what one person finds worthy to collect another does not. I am sure that down the line, I am going to get rid of my extensive collection of Eeyore memorabilia and most of my Sleeping Beauty stuff (well, maybe the Sleeping Beauty stuff will stick around for a grand daughter or something), but other than that, I don't really collect a lot. I love keys, iron, black preferably, and I love silver jewelry, I love cuffs (jewelry again), and movies, oh I love me some movies... what does everyone else collect?
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David Gray at Hard Rock, Orlando was brilliant. he gave us 4 songs off of White Ladder (the big album) and so many other great songs from therest of his catalog. So lucky to have gotten such great seats. We thoroughly enjoyed the entire show!
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I boooked the October wedding this weekend. Mike and I will be covering it together - should be super fun. The bride is making it a Halloween party reception -as in everyone changes in to their costumes after the proper ceremony. The venue looks gorgeous and there will be a horse and carriage for the bride entrance. Looking forward to it. Business is looking good. Season is starting. I'm a happier kitten :)
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Work (at least this place...) is soul crushing and for now that is all I will say about that.
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In other news, have a brilliant brilliant new week.

Unthinkably good things can happen even late in the game. It's such a surprise.

2010-04-12T23:49:00.008-04:00

This is the new book by Frances Mayes. You know her - she wrote Under a Tuscan Sun, the book the movie this woman, Diane Lane, was in - WELL.... I won a signed copy of the first edition of the new book "Every day in Tuscany". This is HUGE for me. Under The Tuscan Sun was a pivotal movie in my life and is still today, I love that movie, I love Diane Lane (some days I have the "what would Diane Lane do" moments and then act accordingly,) and I love Frances Mayes that she loves Tuscany, Diane Lane and writing lines like this: "Unthinkably good things can happen even late in the game. It's such a surprise." and books like these. Anyway, just made my happy day yesterday when I found out :)
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My friend from way back, Daniel Cole is doing this awesome project http://www.rockethub.com/projects/35-rockdoves-cool-music-for-kids-made-with-parents-in-mind -- I support him, if you want to I appreciate it and thank you on his behalf :)
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Talked to the officiating person of the Halloween wedding that I may be shooting. She just happens to be someone I work with, as does the bride. The wedding looks to be grand fun, because the bride and the groom aren't your "traditional" type of people, and the brides ideas for the reception/wedding are just so much fun, I hope it comes to fruition based on schedules, etc.
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Work is work - I made more in commissions today than I did in the last two weeks. Go figure...
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Tomorrow - maybe Tampa, maybe not, if not then most definitely another round of GBC'ng at the house, the filing cabinet o' death needs to be purged and maybe I'll take a stab at the Rubbermaid bucket of photos/neg/cd's of images that needs culling and uploading. Till then, y'all have a brilliant brilliant!

it JUST HAS TO BE

2010-04-10T14:31:00.006-04:00

River Don, Kemnay, Aberdeenshire, Scotland - BikeonBye
Inspired by my friend http://notesfromthefrugaltrenches.com , I have to keep my eyes on the prize. The prize is a simpler life, I have responsibilities that need to be met, getting Chels through the 4 years of school to finish, and then... then is when it's supposed to start, but I can't assure myself it will start then unless I take the necessary steps now. I have the soundtrack of Braveheart in my head ALL THE TIME, I have images of Dunnottar -- On the coast near Dunnottar Mains, off the A92, about two miles south of Stonehaven, flipping through like one of those viewmaster reels we had when we were children, memories of seeing the painting at the museum in Endinburgh of The Bruce at Bannockburn and the tears that welled in my eyes because I was so moved, my heart calls to be elsewhere. It doesn't have to be Scotland, it doesn't have to be now, it JUST HAS TO BE. So that said, I have to set up goals. I going to rough draft them tonight and I'll post tomorrow as if I put it in writing it tends to happen more often than not.
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The other day I said wanted to be able to leave Chelsea and my grands, if I have any, some $ to use as they needed after I was gone. Charity came to mind as well, and I thought of who/what I would leave to causes I believe in, etc. I sorted it out a bit: 1)Give a monthly donation to shelters that provide safe havens for women & children who are the victims of abuse, 2)Give an incoming freshman coming from a single family home a yearly scholarship to a woman who is seeking higher education at Florida Southern in Chelsea's name, 3)Give to Cancer research and 4)Give to Parkinson's research. That's what I have as of now. I know it's not a global give, I have a tendency to worry about those closer to home than in Africa or Haiti, I know it probably makes me look a bad person, but I'm truly not, I just think that if we can't make sure our own children in the Appalachia's, etc. are getting food/education/shelter everyday, how can we be expected to make sure those in Africa are?
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I have taken time off this past month from work which has affected my commissions, which in turn has affected my paycheck. I get my standard wages, that's no problem, had vacay time banked, had sick time, when needed, still have a few days of them left, but during this time off I noticed time and time again, that I found myself saying, "this is how it should be" I can get work done in the morning and then have the day to do things I want to do. Slowly but surely, the shift bid helped in that, I am seeing light still at the end of the day. I'm in no position for the next three years to move physically, so I must move/shift things mentally, emotionally till then.
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Working on the GBC at the house is helping, I'm finding the disdain I felt a few months ago of being a renter of a house (I'm used to having people take care of mundane things like the yardwork, appliances breaking down, plumbing problems, roof issues, and getting them sorted out quickly.) dissipate. Even moreso now that I am looking to paint the bedroom the colors that I want, new bookshelves have been bought for the front room, and we are eyeing that entertainment console, who knows, it may start looking like I want soon.
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Off to work on the table of doom (the white farmhouse table that has taken over my bedroom) - I swear it will be done by this time tomorrow. Till then - have a brilliant brilliant.

Bids, Trimming the fat, LCL Photography and the GBC

2010-04-09T14:56:00.004-04:00

Got my shift bid results in. Starting May 1st, I work Sat-Sun 7:30-5:30, Monday 7:30-11:30am, Tues- Weds - OFF, Friday 7:30-5:30. Still no weekends off, but I get out before it gets dark, so that's a redeeming feature. Anyway, it will just have to do until my plans come to fruition, I am hopeful that will be sooner rather than later and the steps I am taking are only helping to expedite that. In the meantime, a girl has to make her cents somehow...
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Through her foundation, Cyndi Lauper is creating the first permanent shelter in New York City for homeless gay teens and young adults. The True Colors Residence is set to open next year in Harlem. That makes me happy.
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Maintained my weight loss - next weigh in is in about a week, so we'll see where we are there. I am planning on buying a set of vintage keys I have had my eye on for a while now once I hit the 20 pund mark (only 6 more to go).
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Went through the photo session ideas I have for the coming year and am chomping at the bit to get started. Started looking at sites as well that I will be using. I have plenty of locations and settings to use, but wanted to some new ones. Also today the firemen were out doing their big "change in the boot" fundraisers and that reminded me of the sessions with emt's and firefighters that I still have to do and that got me even more excited for the coming months. LCL Photography is going to have a busy summer regardless of what the present DAYJOB (which is the nice word for what I want to call it) has in store.
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GBC is going well, unloaded a whole mess of books and some dvd's for L to donate to the library, I cleaned out the bedroom closet, got rid of almost all vestages of a prevoius relationship that really needed to be thrown out, all that's left to do with the closet is go through the huge rubbermaid container that is holding 1000's and I do mean 1000's of images, negatives, printed photos etc and get them on the external hard drive so I can get rid of the actuals. I'll keep the negs in a case just for safe keeping, in case a subject wants copies but only for a limited time. Next GBC project is the desk in the bedroom. It is a white farmhouse table, not entirely made of wood, but I love it, and I'll use it till it decides to not let me. It is covered in "things that I need to look at/do something with etc.", so that is tonight's project. L and I saw a entertainment console we both liked that will compliment the china closet I already own and is deep enough to fit the current tv we own as well as the new one we are thinking about in the future, so that's a plus.
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Till tomorrow- have a brilliant brilliant.

Happy Tartan Day! Leaving a Legacy

2010-04-06T11:54:00.003-04:00

Happy Tartan Day! The Tartan pictured is The Clan Keith antique tartan which sometimes is also referred to as Keith Austin tartan - a shared one. I, myself am not Scottish, but my ex mother in law was 100% and that makes my darling daughter a 1/4, so I celebrate all things Scottish. The fact that I LOVE SCOTLAND may have something more to do with it.
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The majority of my day is spent sitting. I lead a sednetary lifestyle and as such I have what I call a spread of an ass. My ass is not the problem, it's my tummy. The majority of the weight loss journey goal would be to feel better and see a lower pants size because of it. Most of my blogger friends are on some kind of program or are making small changes themselves to lose some weight. I read about weight loss, I can walk on the treadmill at an incline and go for a long time, I can lose 15 pounds and my face looks slimmer, my waist is slimmer, but nothing gets rid of this tummy. It's frustrating. Any ideas would be helpful.
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http://unclutterer.com/ is one of my fave new sites (well new to me).. I'm going to have a look at the book next time we're at the bookstore and maybe buy it, but I love this site!
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A very rich person should leave his kids enough to do anything, but not enough to do nothing.” – Warren Buffett -- I love that quote. As a single mom, who at the most affluent of times only made $38,000 a year, have always wondered how I would be able to leave Chelsea an inheiratance, and have some to give to my grands. I have always maintained a "YES" answer to almost everything she has asked for - experiences especially, and I want to be able to continue to do that and let her do/have everything I did and more that a two parent family would be able to afford and do. I also want to be able to buy my grands their first cars and help with their college education etc. I still have no idea of how I am going to do it and I'm not getting any younger, but it has to start somehow and sometime. Her college tuition is 35,000 a year, and although for this last year, it has been subsidized a great deal by her grants, scholarships etc, her sophmore year that starts in August, I am going to have to pay more than I did this year. Do I wait till she's out of school to start planning an estate, do I put away $5.00 every paycheck, again, any ideas would be helpful if you have them.
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Tonight we pick up my mother from the airport (she's been in VA visiting my father who is there for work till mid May) it'll be nice to have her back, but it's been nice just L and me here as well. I took off yesterday because I wasn't feeling well and now have the next 6 days off (I go back to work on Monday) to look at situations and make plans accordingly. Thursday I find out what my new shift will be starting May, which in turn will give me Fri- Sun to decided what my next move is. That is what it's about - moving forward.
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Have a brilliant brilliant.

purpose, paling in shadows.

2010-04-03T20:17:00.005-04:00

Another day goes by at the day job and it finds us closer to our shift bid. There are not that many "good bids" to go around and obviously seniority and adherence and production and sales all account for where one stands in the bid process. My bid happens on a day I'm not scheduled in, so I have to call my requests in, they will get accepted or denied. I will still not know what my schedule for the next 6 months is until another two days after the bid. Kind of hard to make any concrete plans when your life is being controlled by others time frames. It's hard to look ahead. That added to the fact that I am just spent when I get home doesn't help the day job cause. I know I should be grateful for the job, I know the unemployment rate in Fl is 10%, I know these things, it doesn't change the fact that I am not being true to myself there. Needs must. I stay until I can't take it anymore or what I would like to happen happens. (Working on that now.) Live your life with purpose. I been trying to live that, and it's not happening here. I've never been so tired, I think. I am running on empty, but by God, don't I hide it well...
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I never feel tired when I am behind the camera. Hot and sweaty sometimes, (Fl heat in summer - yeah,not a fan, but tired? No. The exhaustion doesn't hit me till the end when I am back to the editing desk. The adrenaline pumping through me subsides. Most of my sessions are 5-6 hours, I try and get the light and the feel of the shoot and run with it till I feel that neither the subject, the day/night or I hasn't anything else to give creatively. Some shoots take only 1-2 hours, the feeling is still the same. When I am photographing people and am in the groove, my heart feels like it will burst, my grin is so wide my cheeks hurt, the Lou face as its widely known. Smiling out loud almost. The exhaustion I feel when I am not doing what I love is staggering. To the point that my feet are like lead bricks and my mind so unfocused even the desire for the act of doing even the most exciting part of a mundane day wanes to a trickle. There is no smiling and to tell you the truth, my heart couldn't give a rat's ass. I don't discount a hard day's work. I don't think that a 9-5 for me is undoable, been there, done that a bunch of times. I do think a 9-5 here (well -- there) where I am is undoable.
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the point is to just keep moving, and to just say yes to life.

2010-04-02T13:40:00.000-04:00

I don't know. But it's exhilarating and terrifying. I think the point is to just keep moving, and to just say yes to life." - This is what Susan Sarandon had to say about life after ending her long term relationship with Tim Robbins. This is what I agree to. Not just about relationships but the next step after a big change. In my case, it is a mixture of changes in various areas of my life. But she's right. Exhilarating and terrifying are fantastic words to describe this feeling.
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The Library today. Haven't been in yonks. Our local library is so small in comparison to the one I had when I was a teenager in MD, two stories tall, one side of the top floor dedicated childrens library, the other side, you had to be a teenager to go on, or very very quiet and with your parent(s). Many a Saturday morning and afternoon was spent there after Saturday am chores were done, my dad would drop me off and I would spend hours soaking up various and sundry books, magazines, etc. I read a book about Colette the writer that at the time I thought was shocking, books on how to do stuff like investing, painting your trimwork, organizing, photography books, for "when I'm older". I ended up getting a Don Aslett book on organizing office space (which believe me kittens, I need OMG - my desk alone takes up half my bedroom square footage) and some other organizing book and Kathleen Turner's Autobiography. Love her - a broad in the truest sense, much like Sarandon, my grandmother Eula and oh, yeah, me. :)
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Everyone I read is talking about Easter - my family doesn't really do the whole celebrating that anymore. I don't know why, this particular time it's because both my parents are in VA (my mom went up for a long weekend to see my dad), my daughter is in Lakeland, L and I are here, so scattered I suppose, and the fact that I don't care for Ham or Turkey and the trimmings and such, it's not a big loss for me. I don't disagree that having family around would be nice, but I'll live.
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Pearl Jam has donated $210,000 to plant 33 acres worth of trees to offset the carbon emissions of its 2009 tour. The Cascade Land Conservancy will plant the trees and native plants in the Puget Sound area. -- That makes me happy, but you know what I'm thinking there are PEOPLE in Puget Sound area that could have used that $210,000 for food and shelter. I'm just saying....
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Still working slowly but surely on GBC, and getting rid of things. You'd be surprised the stuff that I'm wary of letting go, but then some stuff people might think I would keep is actually stuff I had NO qualms whatsoever getting rid of. Strange. As far as the fit stuff is concerned, I have lost a total of 14 pounds, am still working on that, next weigh in is next week, haven't been exercising - fail, intake has been craptastic, because I haven't taken the time to make my self stuff, that has to change toot sweet. The DD is well, summer for her starts end of April, so we'll see if she's going to stay up at Uni to work or come home and find some work here to occupy her time till Fall Semester. That pretty much sums it up. Be back soon, till then have a brilliant brilliant.

April showers, plans, link love

2010-03-29T23:04:00.004-04:00

This evening starts yet another "weekend" for me. I have a meeting tomorrow regarding an opportunity that I am interested in pursuing - we'll see how that all pans out, but other than that no solid plans. This is good. A Chill relax few days will do the body and soul good.
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http://www.aolnews.com/philanthropy This <-----? makes me happy.
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http://www.mhouserphotography.com/index2.php#/home/ - so does this :)
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April showers bring May flowers -- well it's not April but this morning it rained so hard on my way into work I almost stopped the car on the side of the road because I couldn't see the car in front of me. It was so bad! By like 2pm it ws the most lovely day though, Florida weather... the sybill of meteorolgist's nightmares. April is right around the corner - my high school reunion is happening - most of my class is either on their way to Lima, Peru right now or will be next week or so. A new shift bid at work, so who knows what hours I'll be working, Easter, National Tartan Day (the 6th if you're wondering) Seeing David Gray
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PP-f8TDb2n4 and some various and sundry projects I am working on, should make for an interesting month.
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http://www.apartmenttherapy.com/ This <---- is my downfall. I have such a love/hate relationship with this site, it's not even funny. SOOOO INSPIRING! I want to go out to the Home Depot and Lowe's and Target and furniture boutiques RIGHT NOW!Seeing how I share a house with my sister at this point, and we have different design styles on some things, it's even worse for me to go to the site, but once I'm there, it sucks me in and I can literally look up at the clock and have lost a good hour. ARRRGGGHHH.
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My mother leaves for Md on the 1st of April to visit my father and her family for Easter (my dad in doing some work in VA sub contracting out till May) we were supposed to go see "How to Tame your Dragon" at the movies tomorrow, but my meeting is making us postpone till she gets back on the following Tuesday, I love that my mother loves silly kids movies as much as I do. She calls them "dancing mice" movies as in "no violence and blood etc", I call it good fun. I'm so glad we get to hang out like that.
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Anyhoo kittens it's getting late - to all a good night and I'll see you tomorrow after the big meeting :) Have a brilliant brilliant!

One more step, one more step...

2010-03-23T18:12:00.010-04:00

Today was spent taking photographs of everything that caught my eye, that spoke to me on some level, and although I really fell in love with a few of the resulting images, this one, even though the quality is nowhere near a shot I would normaly publish spoke to me louder than any other. Why? Because this is how I feel as of late. Perseverence to get up that hill, climb those proverbial stairs that will lead me to the destination I have planned. It's a long arduous journey and my little legs don't know if they can make it but, but my stubborness and my "I told you I could.." attitude is getting me one step closer to the top everyday. There are some good things coming down the pike, I just wish it was going a little faster.
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The Spring GBC took hold of me again and it has translated into me calling a new landscaping service to get the lawn back to some sort of lovely. L is growing veg of all sorts - tomatos, cucumbers, dill, basil, different types of lettuce, oregano, dill, catnip and yellow peppers, so ideally, I'd like to get a raised bed for her to put the growing plants in. I also have to somehow get the non used wasp nests that are on the front entry down without wiging myself out (I don't DO bugs), and convince my sister that the front walkway plants are butt ugly and SURELY we can find other color plants to take their place. Besides that, even the chicklet got in on the action the other day, as there are now 3 bags of clothes that can be taken over to the donation center (and my chicklet doesn't buy crap clothes - so some thrifty shopper is going to be a lucky duck). Much to do, but at least I have a good start on it.
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Slowly but surely, I am finding it easier to do without somethings I thought I would miss terribly, and it's saving me cents and sense as I am not worrying over those things as much. I know that in order for me to get to where I want with the business, with the house, with my emergency savings, with the travel plans, sacrifices have to be made. It's difficult in that where I am workwise is not where I'd like to be (or am used to, by far) salary wise. I'd like to think that if a better paying day job came up that I could continue to live with the same salary as before and put the surplus into those categories, but it seems there's always something more important. I wonder how many of us have that happen? I would think quite a few. I know VERY few independently wealthy people. How about you?
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Have a productive brilliant brilliant.

Country and who's queen?

2010-03-15T23:41:00.007-04:00

A friend of mine, http://notesfromthefrugaltrenches.com/ lives in England, and although I've no desire to go back and live there, (been there, done that, have the ex-husband and chicklet from there, moving on...) I do miss the countryside. We lived near Marble Arch in London proper and when we did make a trek out country way, I was amazed at how much I secretly loved it and wondered if someday in my oldness I would ever want to live in the country. The views are spectacular, the people, for the most part, warm and friendly, and the slow steadiness of it all was and I must say is still now, quite appealing. I am a suburbs girl at heart, I know, not too much in the city but close enough to get my nightlife on. Country living will have to wait a little while longer, meanwhile, I live vicariously through her photographs of the gorgeousness that is Devon, England
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The chicklet and I had lunch with a few of her friends on Saturday before Founders Ball (a formal dance at her Uni). It was good fun, her friends were lovely to meet finally and I still miss her bunches. Good things she's coming home for the weekend in two weeks. She's sent off letters to some med schools to find out if the track she is on at uni is filled with the prereqs for admission when the time comes. Who knew, my chicklet, a D.O. ( http://www.osteopathic.org/index.cfm?pageID=ado_whatis )
I'm kind of dead proud really.
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My friend http://www.remodelingthislife.com/ had a link love post up the other day, I was brave today and added a link to here -- I don't do much in the way of promoting the blog, because a)I think I should probably have more photos in it and b)it's just me, it can't be all that exciting... but I took a leap of faith and I appreciate that she offered the opportunity. You should go visit her, she does always remind me that indeed, simple is beautiful
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Tris Cabin from Ideal Standard
There isn't much more decadence that I need if I had one of these. I have been having neck/shoulder pain for the last three years now, I have nerve problems and have found that a sauna treatment every once in a while does amazing wonders. Some people need meds, me, 30 minutes spent in a sauna, and I can take on anything. Yet another thing to put on my list for "when I am queen...I shall have/do/make happen..."
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Alas, I am not queen yet, and therefore, my day tomorrow looks like this:
1) Breakky with my most super fun, super smart friend, my sister Laura,
2) Take Buzz (the car) to get an oil change
3) Go to Walmart and pick up printer ink and a few other things
4) Grab my mother, go to Target and pick up a few things and drool over the Liberty of London new stuff that Target is only carrying
5) Pay bills
6) Work on logo and get pricing for cards, labels etc.
7) Purge paperwork and magazines still laying about
8) Kitchen floor - hard core scrub/mop
Yes, indeed not queenly at all I'd say, but a productive day nonetheless. To end it, I am rewarding myself with the some episodes of "Carnivale" (Love Nick Stahl, I do), Thank God for Netflix :) Have a brilliant brilliant.

Kicking at darkness, lcl photography, proust and you

2010-03-11T14:20:00.001-05:00

I woke yesterday morning at 9:00 which is what the alarm was set for. I then proceeded to continue lying in bed until 12:30 or so when my mother, God Bless her, called to tell me that she and my sister were going downtown to get the Boondock Saints 1 tickets (showing only 1 night in theatres - if you're here in Orlando - at PI AMC24) and going to Ghiardelli for ice cream, would I like to join them? I declined and then my mother said "so much for a productive day" and at that moment I knew what Alexandra Stoddard meant when a client tisked at her saying "can't be productive by sitting, time is money" for sitting in a front room gazing about after having been in a rainstorm to get to said client's house. Surely, my sojourn into blissful rest was indeed work, work to get my self back to my self, my mother wouldn't know that after last evening going through things and choosing what to get rid of and looking at photos of a time long gone was emotionally draining. Coventry Patmore says "Don't deny in the darkness what you have seen in the light" Last night there was no denying and thus exhaustion set in quite quickly. There's no way she would have known this, I haven't shared it with her. So I declined and sent them on their way. I had to pull focus this morning, that coupled with the fact that I have a cold and have sinus issues that are killing me, I laid in bed for ANOTHER 25minutes before greeting this lovely day.
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I lost 10 lbs. Not because I am sick, but because I have been trying harder even though I have been eating what I wanted. Only a kabajillion (or so it seems) to go. Orig. it was so I would be healthier for the reunion in April, as Peru calls for walking, a lot of walking actually. Work schedules and current obligations would not allow for such a trip, but that shouldn't have stopped me, it did, but I jumped on the horse again and am trying. I'll let you know what happens as it happens. Lucky you lot.
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I have decided that not only am I going to continue photographing everyone I know and love, I am doing a coffee table book of a brilliant shot of them and a page of a Proust Questionnaire. It's a staple in vanity Fair, but that's for celebrities, why not do one of the everyman/woman/child? In that vein - I give you my own, you'll get to see the picture much later..

What is your current state of mind? Content
When or Where were you most happiest? When - Singing onstage in Peru, playing Eva Peron, Where? Behind a camera lens
Which living person do you admire? There are many, my mother, my sister, but outside of that? Sam Jones, Regan Cameron and Lou Lasprugato
What is your greatest fear? My child dying before me or anything bad happening to her.
What is your motto? "No coward soul is mine in this world's storm troubled sphere" - Bronte
What is the trait you most deplore in yourself? I am almost always blinded by loyalty.
What is the trait you most deplore in others? Apathy, Disloyalty
What is your greatest extravagance? Anything my daughter wants. I'm awful at saying no to her.
Where would you like to live? Somewhere with public transport near a city center but not directly in it. Failing that? Glasgow
What is your fave quality in a woman? A sense of self and the courage to be that person
What is your fave quality in a man? Humour and Passion and knowing what it means to BE a man and not a boy.
What do you consider the most overrated virtue? - Patience, as I haven't any.
Which living person do you most despise? There are 2 broken people that if they'd been run over by a bus, I wouldn't miss them.
What talent would you most like to have? Sam Jones'
What do you consider your greatest achievement? My daughter, without a second thought.
What do you regard the lowest depth of misery? Apathy, letting down those I care for
What is your fave occupation? Photographer
What do you most value in your friends? Their time
Who are your fave writers? Alexandra Stoddard and Frank McCourt
What are your fave names? Chelsea, Liam, Evelyn and Michael
How would you like to die? In my sleep, preferably after the New Year so I would have been able to have a last Christmas with my family. Failing that, whilst photographing someone/something, because at least I'd be doing what I love.
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I leave you with the fact that if I know you, have ever photographed you, chances are good you'll be answering these questions soon. Off to see Boondock Saints on the big screen

The girl, the photos, the GBC

2010-03-05T13:39:00.007-05:00

My daughter came down the ramp at OIA airport last Monday and I thought I was looking at a different child. She lives an hour away from me at University, I see her once, maybe twice every 6 weeks or so, sometimes it's more, sometimes less, but this time, it just seemed different. She was coming back from Spring Break in MD, (I know weird right? Upper East Coast kids clamor to get down here to FL, this one? She wants snow.. so off she goes to see Bff's in MD) and wasn't any taller, didn't gain or lose any dramatic weight, hadn't colored her hair. It was just different. There was something about her that just made her shine and make me look at her differently. When I get a handle on what it is, I'll let you know, but I'm still stumped. She's 18, and although there are times when she still needs me, she's pretty much doing things on her own, and maybe that's what this feeling is, I don't know. She's at Disney World today with "the boy", so I love that there's still that little kid spirit in her every once in a while.
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As much as I hated to, I did a massive clean up of blogs that I read, some who hadn't posted in a year, some who make it difficult to load with all the ads and what not on the page, some that don't pertain to my life any longer. I also did it on my facebook and my myspace, it just feels like a clean start to a new month, seeing how the next week is the BIG GREAT BIG CULL at my house(I've taken off all week- 3 vacation, the rest I had off anyway) where I will be chucking out things with a vengeance, it just seemed fitting to do it virtually as well.
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The job is the job. I am feeling the effects of it not being a 9-5 M-F gig more often than not, but needs must.
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I have a 2 day photography conference I am going to in Miami in May, looking forward to that, as I will be going up the day before to just relax, but I really am looking forward to it, even if I walk away annoyed by the whistles and bells, I will also walk away with inspiration to the max. I have every urge to say Hey, remember that girl up there? and this will only help that.
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Promise this week will be better blogging, just trying to catch up with all the reading and emails is exhausting.
have a brilliant brilliant.

Thoughts erupt like butterflies...

2010-02-21T14:50:00.000-05:00

Without realizing it REAL RADIO 104.1 encompassed my whole young adult life this morning in music. Billy Idol's "Rebel Yell" started the minute I turned the car on, by the time I had gotten my Diet Coke, Depeche Mode was bringing "Strange Love", at the crossroads of Rte 4 and Rte 92 was Pearl Jam's "Evenflow" and as I parked the car in work's parking space, The Talking Heads "Once in a lifetime" lulled me into this head space. Indeed, this is not my beautiful house, and I'm not my former.
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I've forgotten my phone at the house today, and feel naked. Ridiculous, when you think about it. Some people when they don't have their watch or rings on, feel naked, me it's my phone.
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Took more photos yesterday, it felt good. I am disappointed that my camera wasn't working last time we were in Glasgow, will know better next time to just suck it up and pop into Boots and pick up some disposables for just in case. Mind you, I should keep some in the car for that same reason, the vista this morning on the way in was just amazing. My photograph, "Crane residing" is being entered into the Florida Audubon Society Photography Contest in the Close Encounters category, and I am still shopping websites before I make final decision which platform to go with, but that's more progress made than in the last 6 months so...
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Time isn't holding us, whispering hands they lead, me, away.

Harmony, Muses and LCL Photography

2010-02-16T02:20:00.002-05:00

"Harmony is the inner cadence of contentment we feel when the melody of life is in tune" Yeah, these past few weeks, I have been so outta tune it's not funny. No more flat notes!
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Sunday -- 6:45 AM, running 15 minutes late already, coolant light comes up on car dashboard as I start out of the driveway. It's 32 degrees outside in "sunny Florida" on Valentine's Day. I still have to drop off cards at my parent's house so they have them when they wake up, welcome to my morning. Coolant dealt with, cards dropped off, workday commenced - Happy Singles Awareness Day.
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Speaking of Valentine's Day, I know to most people, it's a big deal, really not so much for me. In relationships, I think if you express your affection/love/desire whatever on a daily basis to your significant other, or others as the case may be, then you don't have to have a "special" day to celebrate that. I think this is a requirement in any real and loving relationship. Now, don't get me wrong, I like going out to dinner and getting cards, but those actions shouldn't be a one day type of thing. Any real man knows this - so that should be no big surprise.
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Things have been crazy busy, work, the house, Chels at school, traveling here and there, various and sundry projects I am working, I cannot wait until I get a few days off to just reconnect with some friends and take a breather. .
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Saw "When in Rome", I was surprised by Josh Duhamel's performance, I saw him in vegas and liked him, but didn't know if the "charming scalawag" he does so well, would transfer to big screen. He was charming but he was also sweet and it was a cute movie. I recommend it for that.
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Next - "Boondock Saints" back on the big screen for 1 nite only - so excited! Brothers McManus - how can you go wrong with that?
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ETA: Monday -- T-9 hours and my weekend starts - it's an odd thing working 4 days/3 off, with the 3 off being Tuesday, Weds and Friday. Although I get to go out and see friends on those nightS, more often than not on Tues-Weds I run around getting errands done and come Friday night, I can't stay out till all hours, cause I have to be up at 6:00am on Sat am. Bummer- but it's not stopping me, Imma see my music and friends this next "weekend". Tuesday, I think we are going to Tampa, Wednesday night - I'm hoping we catch Howie Day at The Social, it's All Saint's Day and I can only think of one better way to spend it, so...,Friday - I thought Matty Mac was playing but I'll have to check the planner, if so I want to go up and see him, Saturday night, going to catch up with some new friends and see some local entertainment. Am I getting too old for this running amok? Probably, but you know what - screw that.
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The new myspacepage is up www.myspace.com/liveandcreatelight This is the launch of the business rebranding/relogo the new name of the business is LCL PHOTOGRAPHY (for live and create light, which is what of course I aim to do in my own and in other's lives), I can also be found on the twitterverse at http://twitter.com/pocketfuloposes I am still uploading some photos and have to finish up the front page, but it is running at least, feel free to hop on over and friend us if you are so inclined. I have felt so creatively stifled for a while and its great to be feeling the muse again.
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till next time kittens, have a brilliant brilliant.

I-hop, therefore I am...February Fabulousness

2010-02-01T18:45:00.009-05:00

I miss this. I miss having the time to take photos. I miss seeing the laugh lines, the crinkles in foreheads. I miss catching a crane in his morning walk. I miss the weight of the machine in my hand. I miss the stories it helps me tell, the side of people they themselves don't see, the light at the end of the day, the haze in the early morning, the reflection of the sun on the calm lake, but there it sits, forlorn, in its safe bag waiting for the day I can play again. I hope it's soon.

-----------------I am going to be going in for surgery in September probably. I think I will wait until after my birthday, because really, who wants to have black eyes and bruising on their birthday? No, it's not what you're thinking, I'm not succumbing to the knife for a nip and tuck. I find that my eyes are my absolute fave part of my body. Not only do I find them quite lovely, they are a necessity for my love of photography. I have to have the muscles in the eyes tightened as the wandering of the eyes, as I get older is getting a little worse and I've had enough of it. My eye guy says a week and I should be able to drive again, so we'll see, my next consult is in late July.

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February 1st - February is not, by history at mine, a good month. When we lived in MD, all ill will fell upon us in February, cars broke down, too much snow hindering school and work days, health problems, money problems, etc. You name it, it happened and all hell broke loose in February. I have decided to stop that curse and prophesy and hereby declare February a month of Fierce Fabulousness.

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Speaking of Fabulousness -- IHOP is once again celebrating National Pancake Day on February 23rd from 10AM-7PM by offering a FREE stack of pancakes. Donations got to Children’s Miracle Network or local charities. I for one have NO problem seeing that donation and raising you a short stack :) Till next time I wish you a syrup filled brilliant brilliant.

Amazing things will happen, I'm telling you

2010-01-29T22:38:00.008-05:00

It's all so good. One thinks of the last two years wasted as nothing but a learning experience indeed. A veritable "how not to SETTLE in any part of one's life" guide. Why bother with mediocrity and/or subpar anything in your life? Toxic people, job that sustains you financially but you lose your SELF in the trade off, unkind, unfocused, passionless people? I just don't have the time. There is just too much great stuff happening now. I'm blessed beyond measure, this I know :)

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This being the first full moon of 2010, it is also known as the wolf moon, in each orbit, the moon reaches this closest point to us, called perigee. Once or twice a year, perigee coincides with a full moon, as it will tonight, making the moon bigger and brighter than any other full moons during the year.Tonight it will be about 14 percent wider and 30 percent brighter than lesser full moons of the year, according to Spaceweather.com. Well, I don't know about all that, but I do know that it was brilliant to see and I loved the clear night sky.

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Sorted out taxes, all finished. Did Chelsea's 2010/2011 FAFSA (her student financial aid package form), pulled credit reports to see where we are financially, so it's a good financial start to the year. Always good to know where you are in the beginning before you make any drastic or big changes. Feel very optimistic :)

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Having caught up with MD friends online and writer friends elsewheres, my sister and mother for Tampa and lunch, hearing from babychick, being able to have uninterrupted intertubes time, all in all today has been glorious! February looks to be right what it celebrates - Friendship month, I'm reconnecting with mine and I hope you are able to do so with yours :)

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" but if you work really hard, and you're kind, amazing things will happen. I'm telling you, amazing things will happen." Conan -- quite possibly the best true thing I have heard in years. Learn from it, especially the being kind part, it matters even more than the hard work. Have a brilliant brilliant :)

Just passing through - it's been a while.

2010-01-22T09:54:00.001-05:00

I've been trying to start this post for the last two weeks. I have actually started and then deleted 3x. Something always gets in the way. Time constraints for the most part, but then they say if something is important to you, you'll MAKE time for it. I had my first days off in a while planned on savoring them by doing things I want to do. Getting back up to speed on emails, blogging, catching up with friends, maybe seeing a movie, (Sherlock Holmes for the 2nd time- such a good movie- Downey Jr. already starting the sequel) and then taking my parents out to dinner. Sleep has been lacking as of late so sleeping in was just decadent and worth every second of the daylight lost.
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CONAN - What an absolute class act. I don't care what NBC does now, I really only watch How I Met Your Mother and Big Bang Theory anyway and they are ABC shows. Last night's ending of the Tonight Show with Conan O'Brian was classic. If only it hadn't have been Will Farrell, who I can't stand, it would have been perfect. The song was a great fit and to see Conan playing up there classic licks on the guitar was amazing. I will miss him. I only really watch him and Craig Ferguson, so now, it looks like I am going to have to stay up even later to get my late night goodness.
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Won 4 tickets to Universal Studios/Islands of Adventure two park/1 day passes - ended up giving them to the daughter so she and her sorority sisters could have a day of fun as I am working so much anyway, also worth it, because I got text messages and thank you's and pictures of roller coasters sent to me, all during the day to let me in on the fun :)
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The Golden Globes - although I am glad the German dude from Inglorious Basterds won an award, Tarantino as a whole was ignored again. Alas, he is the movie world's bad boy and is paying for it over and over again. he's an acquired taste and maybe the Hollywood Foreign Press just doesn't have the taste buds for him.
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I was completely immersed in music over my weekend. Local, national, old videotapes, cd's, tapes, and radio. It was glorious. It never really occurs to me just how central music is in my life's priorities until night time. Last night, I watched some old videotapes (yes, videotapes, not even a dvd, of music videos we recorded in 1992. That tape was not even the oldest we own. It was fun and seeing how I had to get up this morning at 6 to get ready for work it was a nice way to still get the music without being in the city and braving traffic on a Friday night. In the past week especially, music really hit home, every song I heard seemed like it had a memory attached to it, Johnny in the car singing Journey's"Don't Stop Believing" (long before GLEE got to it and butchered it), Lou with his hands in the air imploring us to like Violent Femmes "American Music", L and I with Stevie Nicks "Stand Back", Mallorie and I driving weekends to DE with MB20's "Push", laughing literally out loud whilst being in awe of all that is the little fireplug that is Rob Danzig and "Mother". I was in the grocery store and The Sundays "Here's Where The Story Ends" came over the speakers. Surprised I was. yes, Music makes my world go round. and twirling away, I couldn't be happier.

Plans, Goals, Holiday Madness - 2010 it's going to be intense!

2010-01-01T14:00:00.006-05:00

I wanted to wish everyone a Brilliant New Year! has it really been a whole year? I have not been posting very much this last week as I have been taking overtime at work, family is home and obviously, the Holidays. (I don't know why I capitalize Holiday, it just seems right, L, my sister, the editor, will no doubt yell at me when she returns from South Carolina tomorrow.) Chelsea came home for Christmas and Winter Break, she leaves for St. Pete tomorrow to spend some time with a sorority sister and then she is back to Florida Southern College to lifeguard at a swim meet, then she and the boy (I call him that because I don't know what exactly he is in the great big scheme of things) are going to Disney, and then she is back home till the 11th, when another friend from MD, comes down to stay with her at the college for a few days. Then, in February she is back off to MD for a quick trip to see friends. L is going to London in May, and I have plans for Kentucky and Dallas/Ft Worth as well as some day/weekend trips here in FL. My reunion is also this year and is in Lima, Peru in April. Am trying to work the budget and vacation dates accordingly. This is going to be a big year of travel for this family - can't wait! The Planner is filling up quickly and it's only the 1st of the Year!

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The job is good, I enjoy what I do, the people I work with, the money could be better, but with some OT every once in a while (and they offer it non stop) and bonuses on sales ratios, I think it's looking very good. The point is - I am happy, and as most of you know, if I'm not happy, it really doesn't matter how much $ is thrown in my face.

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The last vestiges of Christmas have been put away at the familial home, except for me bagging up the tree, now sitting in the garage, for another year, I have to bring the rest of my presents back to my house, but other than that, it business as usual. The GBC at my house that was supposed to happen on Boxing Day got postponed to this coming weekend as I had overtime instead. I am excited though to start the GBC of my bedroom, lots to go through, sort, donate and/or throw out. If I don't love it, used it in the last 6 months, or it has no relevance to my life in 2010 onward, it's gone.

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I wouldn't usually post personal personal stuff but find that if I do post something it does inspire me more to accomplish it because I've told someone other than my immediate family so here goes, these are just a few of 2010 goals:

Financial: 1.) Get Roth IRA set up 2)Max out my 401K match by December - right now I am contributing 2%, max match is 6% 3.)Open Christmas account - I know I go crazy every holiday, so this year I want to be uber prepared. 5.)Set aside $ for Fall 2010 tuition/sorority surprises that we didn't account for in 09.

Physical: 1.) Now that I have insurance - get full Physicals for both Chel and I, all dentists and Dr.'s appointments made in January for throughout the year. 3.) Get back on Program

4)Every month get rid of one thing. January is going to be Sweets, no candy machine at work, no gas station packs of jujy fruits, no movie candy at movies etc.

House: 1.) GBC the whole house - my room first. 2.)Have the Maid service come twice this year to do one fell swoop huge clean 3) Remember the filters, batteries for smoke alarms, light bulbs changed as needed, not waiting till we only have one light in the chandelier. 4) The front porch light and outside garage lights installed

Pocketful of Poses: 1) You had forgotten about the business, right? I know, because it seems like so had I this last year, so big focus on the business - marketing especially, I am having cards made up, little flip books, (my sister made 3 of them, on for each genre of photography I engage in - portraiture, live music/entertainment/Disney and general stock (buildings, flora, fauna etc.) and they were awesome, so I want some more of those done. I may have an ad in the two local newspapers to see what business that attracts, and of course word-of-mouth- friends will be asked to suggest me when others need a photographer.

So, there's some of them, I'm sure you have yours as well. Good luck!

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I guess what this first post of the year really should sum up with is that we have all the possibilities in the world in front of us, it's really up to us to decide where, how, when, and why we do things with those possibilities. I'm on the right track and don't foresee veering off. I hope your journey brings you great things this year as well.

HAPPIEST OF ALL NEW YEARS Y'ALL - HAVE A BRILLIANT BRILLIANT.

Warm blessings to you.

2009-12-25T01:53:00.004-05:00

I hadn't planned on blogging this holiday weekend, as it's full of family time and the like, but I was overwhelmed today by the generosity of friends and coworkers and I'm not talking about gifts. I am talking about generosity in their actions, words, spirits, kindness. I wish we could all be like that EVERYDAY. I am striving to continue in that vein throughout the next year. Had my review today. went well. I had no doubts about my cs skills, my rapport with people, and my manner. The product knowledge was what I was worried with an even that got good reviews, so I have a few things to work on but all around a good performance appraisal.

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We have no fireplace at my familial home nor at my own home and it is missed. Many a Christmas the homefires were burning, but there's really no call for it down here in Florida. I hope my loved ones in Maryland, Dallas/Ft. Worth, Kentucky, Utah and Pucciville are utilizing theirs. The snow looked horrendous when I was watching it on tele this afternoon. Stay safe I pray.

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We've opened up stockings and a present, which is our tradition on Christmas eve. It's 1:22 a.m. now Christmas day, not a creature is stirring not even a mouse (I can assure you if a mouse was stirring, so would be everyone else in this house, because I would be on a chair screaming till someone came out and got it out of the house). Mine was my new planner for the New Year. I love walking into Boxing day with the new year and some of it's possibilities and special dates and appointments and concerts already filled in.

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This is the time of full hearts, tummies and heads. So blessed am I. I know this. I hope you recognize your blessings when you have them and do what you need to to be a blessing in other people's lives. Merry Christmas y'all.

Don't wait, do you hear the call?

2009-12-18T22:45:00.004-05:00

One of the most beautiful things in the world to me is these old time microphones. One of the best things in the world to me is people whose music I enjoy or whose opinions I respect perform behind them.

This year holds so many shows, exhibits, performances, opportunities to hear spoken word, the experiences are overflowing the calender and it's not even January yet. I hope you take the opportunities and enjoy them as they come. Don't waste another minute not positively affecting your soul in one way or another. For some people its art, some people it's cinema. Me, it's music and photography and theatre. I guess I am just trying to make sure that 2010 is the best year ever, and one of the ways to make that happen is to do things you enjoyed doing and stopped for whatever reason. Henry Rollins, Craig Ferguson, Carbon Leaf, Howie Day, Clayton Senne, Matt MacKelcan, Christian Wilson, A Chorus Line, there's more, I just don't have my planner in front of me, various and sundry local productions are all a bang up start to the New Year, I look forward to spontaneous outbursts of friends playing out, and me taking a few days to see them perform in Dallas FT Worth (uhm hum- Daniel), Kentucky (Noelie Noel) and NY (Dan The Man) and I cannot wait! I figure the flights are worth it, because my soul aches for great music. I hope your soul hears the call as well.

The other shoe hasn't dropped.

2009-12-17T00:13:00.000-05:00

Ever had one of those moments where you think to yourself 'Ok, this is just too too good, when's it all going to go to hell in a handbasket'? I've been having those moments (and I can hardly call them moments because it's been going on for about a month now) and NOTHING bad has happened. I've probably jinxed myself by saying so, but I don't think I've been this happy in a while. It's not just job related, it's everything. In every aspect of life, it seems, things are going along not just swimmingly, but actually moving forward to the places I want them to be. Coincidence that I let A LOT of things/people/mindsets go at the same time? I think not. Toxicity in whatever form it takes is still toxicity. So waiting for the other shoe to drop, I am no longer. Although if these Carlos Santana pumps were the ones that were dropping, I wouldn't mind as much maybe ;)

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FYI- Caramel Corn is the Devil, I'm just sayin...

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It's 12:07 on Thursday morning. My daughter comes home for the holidays this afternoon until the 3rd or so of January. I can't wait. We have holiday shopping to finish, movies we wanted to catch together, just girl time in general. This is not something that we only wait for the holidays to share. I am so lucky to have such a wonderful relationship with her. How many 18 year old girls do you know want to spend time with their mothers? So many mothers and daughters don't spend the time with each other, not quality time at least, I pray it doesn't change, ever. I'll take hours listening to her tell me about people I'll never meet and an ice cream sundae that feeds 20 people over never having the opportunity to hear about it any day. With that, I say good night and pleasant dreams to you all.

HAPPY HOLIDAYS TO EVERYONE, oh and Congress gets a slice of it's own fat...

2009-12-13T00:50:00.000-05:00

Can't begin to tell you how busy this past week has been. The holidays fast approaching, a party I planned, photos edited and sent out to subjects, holiday cards sent out, shopping, cooking, running on little sleep, but all well worth it. It's been a great week. Next few weeks will be even better as baby girl comes home from uni on Wednesday and my father gets into town next Sunday and then of course, it will be Christmas :) !

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THIS JUST IN: A TASTE OF THEIR OWN MEDICINE (Well, of their own food really, but who's arguing?) Congress will get a school lunch next week when the USDA will serve them chicken fajita strips, sliced ham and canned green beans, the same products the agency gives schools across the country. This makes me happy. School lunches lack in taste, and nutrition and always have. I packed Chel's lunch more than 3/4 of her school years (including high school)

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Many plans afoot for the New Year, especially now that more options are open to me than before, line items on the life list are getting crossed off faster than ever, the weekend in Miami is a no go what with scheduling conflicts, but Sari, Carl and the rest of us will get it together soon enough. April 2010 is the reunion, and that's fun. All I can say is that some little cafes in Miraflores are going to be packed to the gills come April :)

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Today is Sunday, waking up when I want to, breakky with the fam, leisurely reading the paper, I have friends who can literally on a moment's notice make up a meal plan for their family that includes breakfast lunches and dinners for a week. I STILL haven't had dinner yet from last night. I am a great grocery shopper, but couldn't tell you what I am having for lunch today, much less dinner on Friday. I am in awe of these planning goddesses and aspire to be more like them in the new year. ORGANIZATION is the key people, the key! Off to be Brilliant Brilliant :)

Creativity, Inspiration, Art in the Everyday

2009-12-05T21:06:00.006-05:00

Creative outlets, Inspiration, Art in the everyday - these things I desire.

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How old would you be if you didn't know how old you were? 32

What can you not go a day without? Right now? Diet Coke, my lists, my notebooks, talking to my sister.

What do you want that you think you can't have? There's nothing I can think of off the top of my head that I can't have if I put my mind to it. Oh, ok, maybe a royal pedigree, but in the real life, I think it's on me to get/do/be all I want.

Guiltiest Pleasure? Christian Bale and Brendan Fraser movies, movies in general, magazines, and Stouffers Mac and Cheese.

More than a Gift? My daughter, Chelsea; the traveling my family did as a child and still do now.

Fave Place in the world? Behind the camera or Glasgow, Scotland or wherever I can create.

Inspires you to create? Music, movies, other photographers I respect, colors, events

Endless hours spent creating are made better only by... music playing while I create, breaking bread with the people I photograph, their faces when they see final product.

Art in your everyday? The purple flowers on the side of the road on my way home, the hubcap shop, the crane family that visits the front yard, the sun setting, people's faces, mannerisms etc.

It all started when.. I took a photo of Lou Lasprugato at a Juliet's Wishing Well show at Kelly Logan House - Delaware.

What color is imagination? Purple!

What do you pack to pursue your dreams? Cameras, batteries, memory cards, notebooks, pens, photos of loved ones if they weren't coming with me, cell phone and my car.

Attempt to do if you knew you couldn't fail? Aiming small? Be the house photographer for both House of Blues, Orlando and Hard Rock Cafe, Universal, Orlando. Aiming big? Be in the big leagues with Sam Jones and Norman Jean Roy and Ben Watts, and Regan Cameron, photographers I admire and respect. // Y'all have a brilliant rest of the weekend.

Link Love, Stolen 26

2009-12-05T10:01:00.000-05:00

I just read a really interesting post at http://www.bripblap.com/ .. Wealth Work and Life Success The Brip Blap blog -- about quitting soda. I am a Diet Coke fiend and am having the absolute worst time at trying to even cut down much less quit it all together, so this was a good read and inspiration for my resolutions. I am trying to break up with all soda (and as I don't care for lemony-lime drinks like Sprite or Sierra Mist, Diet Coke is my one arch enemy) in the New Year, so I will refer back to this post again I am sure. I love the blog anyway, but this hit home for me.
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Things have been so very busy, I feel bad that I haven't been blogging as much as I would like. I promise that I will do better. Come the New Year, the house wifi and computers etc. will be all sorted out and I will be able to do posts at 2 a.m. if the mood comes over me, alas, right now, that option isn't available to me unless I move in here, my parents house, and that, my friends isn't going to happen. Bear with me.
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http://myparentswereawesome.tumblr.com/ While giving link love, I thought I'd bring this one up. Photos of your parents are priceless and fun when you look at them, now think if we all were able to look at them as well. "Dude! Your parents WERE indeed awesome!"
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Today-more holiday shopping, cards finished up so I can mail them on Monday, bank deposits, bookstore, laundry and trying to keep dry. We got hit with some serious rain and lightning the last few days. Chel is in the lightning capital of Florida (I think it might be the Lightning capital of the USA- Lakeland, FL) AND she has been sick and achy the last week and a half so the storm didn't help her out at all either. I know we need the rain, but come on, I think we've cleared the deficit now. I suppose I shouldn't complain as there are friends up north, who are shivering the night away as it's already snowing.
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http://www.myspace.com/anthonyraneri -- "Ballad of Bill The Saint" on Ant's player. Quite possibly the best I have ever heard him. yes, it's Ant from Bayside. I know, you were surprised weren't you?
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Stole this from Frugal Dreamer http://www.frugaldreamer.com/
Last Movie I Saw In A Movie Theater? I'm seeing Boondock Saints on Sunday, so I'll go with that one, but I know it was "Fantastic Fox" or something like that with George Clooney in it.
What Book Are You Reading? Been WAY to busy to read books, but was able to get through The Goddess Guide - Gisele Scanlon http://www.amazon.com/Goddess-Guide-Gisele-Scanlon/dp/0061434957 I can flip through a magazine quickly and read blogs like there's no tomorrow but haven't read a book in a while.
Favorite Board Game? Monopoly
Favorite Magazine? I read WAY to many, but I do love Lucky, Vanity Fair, Allure and First the best.
Favorite Smells? French Vanilla Candles from White Barn Candle Company - alas they are no more, so now just french vanilla candles.
Favorite Sounds? Good live music, Soundtracks to films I love, my daughter's laugh
Worst Feeling In The World? When I have to say no to my daughter
First Thing You Think of When You Wake? I hope it’s not raining! ( Stole that one from Frugal dreamer as well ;))
Favorite Fast Food Place? McDonald's
Future Child’s Name? Boy: Liam Girl: Evelyn (Evie)
Finish This Statement—“If I Had a Lot of Money,” I'd buy you a green dress... (Barenaked Ladies... - "If I had a million dollars") - No really, I would give 2/5 to my parents, 1/5 to my sister,1/5 to Chelsea and put the rest in a savings account so I will have something to live on when I am old and grey :)
Do You Drive Fast? For the sake of honesty in this blog, I'll go with yes.
Do You Sleep With a Stuffed Animal? No
Storms—cool or scary? It depends, am I outside in them, either in the car or physically outside, the WAY NO!. If I am inside (and hopefully all my loved ones are as well..) and preferably in bed, then MOST Definitely.
What Was Your First Car? Chevy Malibu my father handed down to me.
Favorite Drink? Diet Coke. preferably from a fountain soda machine
Finish This Statement—“If I Had the Time, I Would…” Take more photos
Do You Eat the Stems on Broccoli? That's pretty much the only reason why I eat broccoli.
If You could Dye your Hair Any Other Color, What Would It Be? This makes me laugh as I have been dying my hair since I was 13, so I'll go with the light brown with blond highlights that I usually dye my hair now with.
Favorite Sport to Watch? I don't usually watch sports anymore, but if I was back into it, Baseball, Tennis, College Basketball (GO DUKE, GONZAGA and FLORIDA SOUTHERN!)
What’s Under Your Bed? NO IDEA, I'm not going under there to look either... no, really, dust bunnies I think.
Would You Like to Be Born As Yourself Again? Only if was allowed to know what I know now and be able to make some changes in decisions.
Morning Person or Night Owl? HOOT HOOT - Night Owl ALL THE WAY.
Over Easy or Sunny Side Up? I can only eat eggs scrambled well.
Favorite Place to Relax? In bed, with piles of notebooks and magazines and books, and catalogs surrounding me.
Favorite Ice Cream Flavor? I quite like Mint Choc chip, but I do love Haagen Daas Strawberry
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My mothers house is all decorated. My sister deserves all the credit. Not only are all my mother's Santas up, the tree is done, some of the presents are wrapped and on the living room coffee table anxiously waiting their turn to be put under the tree, (we don't put them under the tree till much later as they have to be arranged as we all take turns opening one by one, youngest to oldest and we don't want all the presents for one person all in one corner of the tree skirt-- it's all very complicated, but it's tradition and it works for us, so...) I'm so excited, Christmas, for me by far, is the best holiday ever! I hope everyone is having fun with their holiday traditions and celebrations. Have a brilliant brilliant tomorrow!
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In which I recap (the no tryptophan episode)

2009-11-27T18:41:00.007-05:00

Because my family is pretty unconventional anyway, and my father is not actually in the state this holiday, my mother, sister, my daughter and I decided what better way to spend Thanksgiving Lunner (early dinner, late lunch) at Earl of Sandwich in Downtown Disney and then heading over to AMC Pleasure Island to see "Fantastic Mr. Fox" (mom and I) and "Pirate Radio" (L and Chel). Highly disappointed with "Fantastic Mr. Fox". Was happy to see that the rat was Willem Dafoe though :) Pirate Radio, apparently was a BRILLIANT movie as per my sister, we'll probably see it together soon. I am also ecstatic because we finally get Boondock Saints here in FL. It is at Universal, so it'll be a little drive but worth it, and because I'm going to see it oh, 2 or 15 times, a nice theatre to see it in is a bonus.

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Maybe it's just me, but some of the people "singing" at the Macy's parade and their songs are just noise, right?

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I think it pisses God off if you walk by the color purple in a field somewhere and don't notice it.

--Alice Walker
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Went and bought a phone. Chel and I went together on a Verizon family plan as it seems the majority of her friends have Verizon and so she gets free calls to them. I didn't care one way or another as long as I can call people, have people call me and text capabilities. As soon as I have it set up, I'll send out the number to those who need it.

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As The Black Friday is nearing it's end, I went the whole day without buying anything but a soda. Yay me? I must say I TOTALLY missed being able to go out with my mom and sister and shop. I'll have to sort that out for next year.

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It's a little less than 4 weeks till Christmas - I'm nowhere near done. I do have the holiday card envelopes addressed, so there's a starting point. We have a Secret Santa at work I am participating in, I have to buy for a little one (my 2nd cousin Fiona- now 5 years old, the youngest on my mother's side) which I haven't done in yonks and can't begin to imagine what to get her, and various and other sundry things I need to do. I need to do double time this next pay period.

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Finding myself increasingly frustrated over the lack of Internet and working computer at my house. Am using Dad's computer until I get everything sorted out as far as high speed and a new computer at mine, which I hope will be sometime, end of December, early January, it's ridiculously hard to keep up with the blogs I love and the coupons and the email and fb etc. and still make it home at a decent hour.

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Lots to do, a photoshoot tomorrow for family friends, getting my house ready for the holidays, laundry, and studying for what will be the worst quiz ever on Monday morning. Man did I earn this weekend.

Sunday Sunday and who made you God?, GBC

2009-11-20T18:35:00.011-05:00

Excellent music on the ride home Friday! "Keep Me Hanging On"-Kim Wilde's version, "Chains Of Love"- Erasure, "Too Shy Shy"- Kajagoogoo and "Sentimental Street" - Night Ranger to name a few. Yes, it was Friday night 80's on Mix 107.3, and yes, I knew almost every word of all of those songs. Who doesn't love the 80's?!

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Not usually political or uber religious in this blog, or in my life but I do have a few points I stand strong on and this is one of them. The fact that Patrick Kennedy has been denied his right to take communion by this jackass Dioceses Bishop (on the left Thomas Tobin)because of Kennedy's stance on abortion rights has me steamed beyond all means. This means Kennedy cannot take Communion in Rhode island, he'd have to leave his own state to participate. I am pro choice and not a catholic, but even if I was catholic, I would still be pro choice. No Bishop, Priest or Altar Boy is standing in my way of taking Communion if I so choose to do so. By the way, I was baptized Baptist, and although I don't attend church as often as my mother would like, I still maintain a relationship with God, and HELLO, a BISHOP is NOT GOD, (and in my opinion is unnecessary in one's relationship with GOD) therefore, I would still take communion on the first Sunday of every month if I so choose. Church and State people, Church and State.... where does he get off?
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Black Friday is coming! I will be working so I will not be participating in the chaos that is this fine tradition of consumerism. As it is, the majority of my shopping will be done online, with a few things bought here and there as I can get to them on days off. I am lucky in that my family sends each other and email or tells each other clearly what we'd like or need and then we all work from that list. Just because something is on the list, doesn't mean you'll get it, but you might so put it on the list is pretty much the rule. It works for us and that way nobody is running around trying to find "The Perfect Gift" for someone who just can't make up their mind of what they want.

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My L wrote that we only have 6 weeks to go till the end of the year. Can I tell you something? I looked at a horoscope sometime in September 2008 (when I was still unemployed) and it said that all the job drama would be finished by end of October 2009. I was offered the job on the 30th of October and started the 9th of November. Freaky? I think so. 6 weeks and I don't feel rushed, I don't feel like if I don't finish everything will go up in smoke. There's always next year. 2010, we have so much we can accomplish, I cannot wait! I have so many plans and you know what, this year I'm actually able to accomplish pretty much everything I have set out to do for me and mine. You can't imagine the peace that gives me. It's been a long 2 years, and I have learned soooooo much from those two years. Mistakes made, actions noted, won't make them again. I can assure you that.

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Just got back from Target - clothes shopping for work, haven't done that in a long time so it was nice to buy some clothes for me and not have to justify it to terribly to myself.

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Got a lot accomplished last night - dishes done, laundry two loads, the GBC in the family room as far as magazines is almost done, cleaned out both cars, took out trash, will continue on tonight. I know Sunday nights are supposed to be to relax before the chaos that is a Monday morning, but I'd rather be able to come home to a cleaner, more organized house. Have a Brilliant Brilliant.

Manly men, Link Love, HOLIDAYS

2009-11-19T19:05:00.009-05:00

Well, People Magazine has decided that Johnny Depp is the sexiest man alive in 2009. Clearly, they made a major mistake, because as you and I both know, Clive Owen, he of the gorgeous eyes on your left here, is the clear choice for such a title. I'm just saying. You know who I think is a doll and who's blog is just too too fun? He's a married man, so I will refrain from saying he's a cutie to boot, oh wait, messed that up... go to http://dadsdish.blogspot.com/ Disney, bowling shirts, fedoras, kids, memorabilia, kitsch, you name it, he's got it. Good stuff!

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Photo: Brendan Lynch, Flickr
This? Quite Possibly the best thing on the planet. Eggo's make for a quick breakfast and they are so yummy! I can eat Eggo's anytime anywhere. Syrup, butter or just syrup by itself. I'm going to try it with peanut butter, so I can get some protein in the morning.

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Speaking of food, the birthday party for Gerard went well, we had sandwiches, chips, brownies and cookies that I baked, and a decadent cake that Yves made. He's the owner of Swan City Bakery in Lakeland, FL http://swancitybakery.com/ His cheesecake is to die for apparently, I myself don't care for cheesecake, but that's what everyone else was gushing about. The chocolate decadence cake was what I was all about. So if y'all are local and you want some yummies for a party, he'll deliver. Which I may very well do, now that Chel is at school and I am left to baking on my own and was not as happy with the results.

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Started holiday cards last night, it was fun. If you haven't already given me the addy and you'd like a card, you can email me here at liveandcreatelight@gmail.com and I'll get one out to you, otherwise, the rest of you, expect one soon :) It's now starting to feel like the Holidays are here, Black Friday ads are leaking, I see decorations up in stores, prices are being slashed everywhere, invitations to parties are being given out, I LOVE THE HOLIDAYS! I should clarify that statement. I LOVE THE DAY AFTER THANKSGIVING THROUGH JANUARY 2ND! I'm getting excited to see everybody back home and presents and calling everybody, and the tree and the ornaments. Hi, I'm Collette and I'm a big Christmas fangrrrrl. Aren't you glad you decided to follow the blog? Have a brilliant brilliant.

She sells Sanctuary, now if I onlyknew for how much :)

2009-11-17T20:32:00.003-05:00

Remember when I said I was going to see more shows from now on and this coming year? The Cult (see photo) played Hard Rock Orlando Saturday night. I won tickets. Did I go? No. The Cult had a few great hits, Fire Woman, She Sells Sanctuary, Love Removal Machine, Matt Sorum (far right, from Guns and Roses) has taken over drums, Ian Astbury is still a drama queen and their guitarist Billy Duffy (far left) is amazing, but I was just too tired. Relationship drama, and just general catching up on other things overcame the desire to go to Hard Rock. I don't regret missing the show, but I don't know if the opportunity arose again, I would have choosen the same way. If performance is a priority for me, and it is, then I should make more time for it.
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Sunday, was supposed to have been a day of rest. I would have loved to do that, but I had laundry to do and a living room that looked like the magazine fairy came and dumped all of her load on my massive 36" round coffee table. Literally you could not see the top of the table for all that was on it. That and the kitchen needed a scrubdown and I needed to meal plan lunches. As I am quite possibly the only person in my family who doesn't care about football at all, for that matter, most sports, I was not swayed by the silliness that is men running after one another and toppling on top of each other to get a filled pigskin from one end of stadium to the other, and I was able to accomplish most on the to do list tonight. I say that all queen-like, know that as soon as I got home, I put on Forensic Files, and had that on in the background as I did chores, so really, I haven't won at all ;).
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Chels gets proper inducted this weekend to her Sorority - Alpha Chi - so white dress shopping was a success, I hope the photographer is better than the man who shot her graduation ceremony photos, those were atrocious, needless to say, we didn't buy those. I take better shots that that guy and he has a storefront and staff. You can't just give any old person a few cameras and hope for the best at major life events, I wish the school had recognized that when shopping out vendors for the job.
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In other news, I am still thinking about the Legal Administrative Assistant Certification. It has potential to be a good thing down the line, only problem is the timing, it's Thursday nights, now I think the new class starts October 2010, so maybe my schedule by then will work around classtime, so we'll see, but it's something to think about. I'm a damn good Admin, might as well get certified for it.
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Off home, baking to do.

The Key to it all.

2009-11-13T23:15:00.005-05:00

Hello you gorgeous key, you! Not only do you represent my coveted piece of jewelry for the next year, you also symbolize the key to doors that are opening for the first time in a few years. Due to the new job and circumstances in other parts of my life changed or in the process of changing, doors that have been closed are now open. Yes, this key will be mine this year or by my birthday next. It means far too much for it not to be. I cannot begin to tell you how nice it is for me to sit down her for the first time in a week and blog. To read email and be able to answer it, to read my friends blogs, to hop on twitter and see what's been happening. Ok, so it's 9:10 p.m. on a Friday night, but you know what? I'll take it. The house is quiet, I've had dinner, spent some time with the family and now? Now it's me time. Tonight, it was so freeing for me to delete the old business myspace and all email addresses attached to it. I have kept the rebranded business myspace page(see sidebar if you care to see the page with some of my work) and the email attached to that, but eliminating the other page helped out so much with time management as well as moving on to the next chapter of where the business is heading. I suppose the key is also to a door where I am heading. That is a good thing.

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The "life list", which is what I have decided to rename my bucket list (I don't like that term) has had a few check marks completed in the last two weeks, so that's exciting. Still have so much to do, on average a woman lives to be what, 90? Gotta get movin' on that list ;)

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Edwin McCain is coming to town again December 28th. House of Blues. I've shot his show before, so this time it will be nice to just sit and enjoy and listen as opposed to being worried about the lighting or having to adjust exposures, etc. It's a Monday night, I'm off and I'm going. It's another thing that is starting the New Year off right for me, I'm going to more shows, more plays, more exhibitions. I stopped going out and doing it for various and sundry reasons and now, really other than exorbitant ticket prices, I'm not seeing anything stopping me this year from seeing/doing/hearing what I want.

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It's official, there is a day for everything and November 15 is Clean Out Your Fridge Day. I did not know that. Good to know. I pretty much did it last week, but I'll see if there's any drips, etc that needed cleaning up.

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Some of the Christmas presents I ordered have started trickling in. I'm tempted to buy some wrapping paper at the end of the week and just start wrapping stuff as it comes in. One less thing to do the week of Christmas, especially as I get NO days off that week, including Christmas (I work 12-9), so maybe getting a head start is what I should be doing. Starting to address the holiday cards now.

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WOW, I feel like I just threw up all this pent up stuff all over the blog. I know I will make the time to sit and enjoy the silence more often. Man did I miss this.

New logo for business, foodings,

2009-11-07T17:07:00.009-05:00

This is the prototype of my new logo for the photography business. I had a white cotton tee shirt made with this logo in black placed on the bottom left corner of the shirt to see how much I liked it. I love it. The only tweak I am thinking about is making the "O" in the middle a camera lens. New cards will have to be made up but that's good, I need to get re branded all around. Am thisclose to deleting the old myspace accounts and the extra facebook and starting fresh. All the other photographers in this town use their names, and really, mine is so much prettier..lol.. I mean how many Collette's do you know? So yay for new vision.

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Today brought yet another reason for me to be thankful. One of the things on my LIST that is an ongoing list to make my life fuller in all sorts of different ways, I was able to do. It made me happy to do it and also gave me a way to show gratitude to the power that is, the force that listens. I think everyone should make a list and try and do something on the list, even if it's an ongoing self-improvement thing, like giving gratitude on a daily basis, every day.

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I lost 2 pounds last week. I am hopeful that next week will show the same if not 2 pounds more lost. We shall see. Regardless, when I went grocery shopping today, it was with healthy meals in mind. Let me tell you something as well, I bought tomatoes. I don't think I have ever bought tomatoes. I don't care for them unless they are in a sauce or chopped up in salads, and I'm talking chopped up. But I did, I bought some romas, because my L told me I could chop them as fine as those ones I love, without too many seeds, so I'm going to give them a try with my gorgeous lettuce and cucumbers... I know I'm SOOOOOO adventurous with my salad, right?Mind you, I say this whilst eating Stouffers Mac and Cheese (my comfort food if I ever had one...)

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Leave it to Isaac Mizrahi to come up with craziness. His line for Liz Claiborne is too too fun and very me. But this? I love this idea! It's tartan cheesecake. I myself do not care for cheesecake, but I LOVE TARTAN and would most definitely buy one for entertaining at the holidays. Brilliant, this.
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While we are on the subject of food... the glazed carrots at Cracker Barrel. I know, I know, you're shaking your head "CRACKER BARREL?!", but I am an addict for those carrots. Believe me, if I could get the recipe and just do it at home, I'd never go there.

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Now, Ya'll will just have to excuse me while I go kick my sister's arse at Yahtzee :)

Light, Christmas, Free Popcorn tin baby!

2009-11-06T12:04:00.006-05:00

Hurry! The Popcorn Factory is offering a great freebie! Do you have a son or daughter in college? If you sign as a fan of The Popcorn Factory on their Facebook page then they will send a FREE college care package to your favorite student!Offer is limited to first 3,000 participants! What college student doesn't love popcorn? The Popcorn Factory makes the most wonderful popcorn!

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"You will fear the darkness only to the extent that you yourself are not providing light." Marianne Williamson

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The Birthday Party shoot at Pulse the other night was fruitful, lots of good shots of the birthday girl and her friends. It was great to be doing it again. Uploading the final product later today.

Today is final Tuition paydate on Fall Semester. Good thing Spring semester isn't due till Jan 1st. Sorority dues, a new key card/id, and the tuition all in one month hit hard. This should be so much easier to anticipate. Also, I'll know the amount I need for August 2010 for tuition and dues and can budget accordingly now. It's a pain not knowing what to expect and then getting bit in the butt. -- ETA --- Tuition paid, lump stuck in my throat for the last three months - gone.

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Did you know it's 7 weeks till Christmas? Insane right? Have you all started shopping? I picked up two movies yesterday (Julia and Julie for my mother and Star Trek for my father), and have been picking up things here and there when I can, but wow, only 7 weeks. I don't think we will put up a tree at L's and my house because we are at my mother's house pretty much the whole week of Christmas anyway, so that's one less stressor. I always like to keep with tradition but with work, I don't yet know what my schedule will be that day. have to play it by ear. I do know though, that I never miss "How The Grinch Stole Christmas" --the REAL ONE, THE ANIMATED ONE, NOT the awful Jim Carrey one, and "A Charlie Brown Christmas". Those are a constant. L asked me what I am getting myself for Christmas. I hadn't thought about it really, I had one thing in mind, but can't justify the amount it would cost just yet, so I think a spa treatment of some sort would be my present to myself. How about you?

Nigglies, Thanksgiving and the Mouse, Fun stuff looking forward,

2009-11-05T14:17:00.005-05:00

You would think that now that there is the holidays are around the corner, I'd be over the moon. For the most part I am. I can't deny that. Are there still niggling issues that I have to deal with realistically and don't want to? Yes. I can't change people. I can only let them know I am their friend, their supporter in the bad and good, a sympathetic ear, a shoulder to lean on. I am only me. For some people, it's not enough. "Their devils don't go away, but this time when they wake up, I might not be around." - Juliet's Wishing Well That's ok. That's their deal. I have to do what I have to do regardless, and that's continuing being me. Truth be told though, I'm tired of being taken for granted.
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On good notes, Chels is well, we've decided for Thanksgiving we are going to The Crystal Palace at Magic Kingdom (WDW). I can't think that Thanksgiving Day at Disney would be any more crowded than it is any other day, so.. it'll be fun. We have an 11:40 seating so we have early dinner with Pooh Bear, Piglet, Tigger, Eeyore and Rabbit and then off to The Haunted Mansion, Buzz Lightyear, Pirates of The Caribbean and so on... with no dishes to clean up! Whoo hoo, that decision made me happy.
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The new year will be bringing plays and musicals, comedians (can you say Craig Ferguson?) and local and national musicians that I have been wanting to see. This next year is full of possibilities for theatre, travel, seeing friends more often, entertaining, and I am excited for it!
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Tonight- some of my fave shows- Community and The Office. I used to love Thursday night tv, but am not so stressed about Parks and Rec and 30 Rock, so I just watch my two shows and turn the channel for the rest.
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Here's to tomorrow being a great day.

Halloween 2009

2009-11-01T19:25:00.002-05:00

HAPPY HALLOWEEN!!! I hope everybody had a brilliant time! I know we did.

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Popped into the new H&M store in Florida Mall today, so many cute clothes. In fact in the back there was a whole wall display that for all intensive purposes could be my Fall wardrobe once I lose more weight. I need to get down a size and I should be good to go. So many gorgeous sweaters and vests and jackets and L had this sweet wrap dress that looked amazing on her. It's been so long since I had a good clothes shop, but I'm not prepared to do it until I am back down to my reasonable weight/size in my head to spend that kind of money. When I do though, watch out H&M!

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This is my mother and father on Pirate night on Disney's cruise ship The Wonder, it was my mom's 2nd cruise. She loves traveling anyway but to be on a cruise, she enjoys it even more. When you can get my father stoked about stuff like that as well, it's amazing, so YAY! Crazy people, I love them. My mother came in yesterday, then my father comes home end of December, Chel will be back for Thanksgiving and Christmas as well, but till then it's just my mother, my sister and I, and that means a LOT OF LAUGHTER. I am stoked to see her. I show you this photo because this is what she wore last night when she and my sister went to Downtown Disney to do the trick or treat thing. My mom...is awesome.
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November, here we come :)

TRADITION!!! and small steps

2009-10-29T20:10:00.009-04:00

Tradition! At my house the holidays are taken very seriously but not in the religious sort of way. I hate to say it like that, but it's true. We don't go crazy on birthdays or anniversaries, but Christmas is another ballgame altogether. I think it stems back from the fact that my father was 1 of 7 children, and the oldest. He had three sisters and 3 brothers all younger than him and Christmas morning wasn't the most homey family time for him, it was a mad dash to the tree and people just tearing the crap out of wrapping paper en masse. That and the fact that he loves to surprise his girls. That would be my mother, his wife of 43 years, my sister, my daughter and myself. So Christmas morning, even when we think the festivities are over, the last gift unwrapped, he has something else up his sleeve. Last year we got him good, because we were the ones who had the very last pressie, which of course was for him, after he thought he did. I can't begin to show you photos of our tree on Christmas morning because I would be embarrassed at the among of pressies under the tree, but I justify this in my head because we don't go crazy at any other time of year and it's only the 5 of us.

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One of our traditions is that after October 1st, no one is allowed to buy any media (Cd's, books, movies, anything like that) or any non-essentials. You can buy socks and groceries obviously, but other than that NO BUYING FOR ONESELF after October 1st. Another of our traditions is that we are allowed to open up our stockings and 1 pressie from under the tree and we can pick that pressie, but the other people have a veto power they can use on our choice, so we may have to pick another. Usually, the pressie is something like a book to read the night before Christmas morning, new Filofax inserts, something to keep us busy and not thinking about the morning fun still to come. Me, I am CHRISTMAS crazy, I want to get everyone everything on their list and see their faces, it's much more fun for me that way. I used to be such a terrible snoop when I was little. When I was in 4th grade, I found where my parents hid the pressies, and was so bold as to unwrap some of the Barbies I got that year and actually play with them in my room until I got caught. needless to say, I didn't have Barbies under the tree Christmas morning, and I never saw those particular ones again, so... lesson learned.

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Another tradition we have is around food. We almost always have Lasagna on Christmas Eve and Christmas morning there is and has always been Cinnamon Rolls, not just any, they have to be Grands Cinnamon Rolls. Now, mind you, I am allergic to cinnamon, my uvula, you know the little thing in the back of your throat that hangs down, swells up like a freaking golf ball and I can't breathe if I ingest too much, so I am only allowed to have like 2 cinnamon rolls and even then, only after I have had my Benadryl. Then we normally have proper dinner, with the full dining room experience to end the day. I am voting for no Thanksgiving dinner at home this year, as my father will not be here - he's still on contract work in VA, AND no Christmas day dinner at home, it'd be nice to go somewhere and have something different. I also don't like turkey with all the trimmings so that is where my vote comes from primarily, that and the fact that my mom hates to cook and clean up after.

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In the vein of goals and small steps taking towards them, I got a call yesterday from a friend who is having a surprise birthday party for his girlfriend at a downtown club that I used to frequent quite often. He is the Lighting and Sound Manager there, so I guess he was able to get a great deal on getting private VIP room/space and he wants me to photograph the party. This is a no brainer. He is a good friend, a good guy and I'm glad to see him happy with this woman, he deserves it. I also will be able to see some other old friends who work at the club, and hey, I'm not about to get tipsy on the job, but a nosh on is going to happen for sure. I miss photographing people, events, etc, so this is another pop in the can for the business goals. YAY!

Taking little steps

2009-10-29T16:34:00.001-04:00

Is there anything better than warm, fresh from the dryer, soft, fluffy towels? I confess, I sometimes hop in the shower when the dryer has only 20 minutes left so that I have these lovely things waiting for me when I get out. (My laundry room is a step away from my bathroom, lest you think I'm running around dripping wet through the house). After doing laundry this last weekend, and culling yet more clothes, I felt a sense of happiness and ease. It isn't hard looking at things anymore and deciding what to keep and what not to because I want to pare down so badly, all I do is say "Do you make me happy?" "Do you bring intrinsic value to my life?" "Are you something that I would miss so dearly, and can't be replaced?" and the answer to the questions decides what happens next. I love movies, music and books. Clothes, I am not attached to, except for a few pieces. I think the GBC (Great Big Cull) of media is what is happening next and that, my friends, I think will be harder. I do need to replace so many of my Cd's due to the scratches, the poor handling on my part, but am worried as some of them are not in print anymore. EBay, Amazon and the like for the most part can handle that, but I do need to think about proper care and storage for the remaining and survivors of the media cull. So research is needed for cabinetry/CD binders/and the like.

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There are other reasons to want to pare down, the move, when it eventually happens, and it will, I just haven't decided when and where, is a big thing. I won't have Chelsea as she will have her own life, still in dorms, an apartment with friends or on her own, etc, and thus can and will be able to do what and when with rooms. I have some things I want to take care of before then, have all my ducks in a row, shall we say, before I make any decisions on that.

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Taco Bell for lunch today, haven't had it in ages. Soft tacos, SO GOOD!, yet SOOOO BAD.

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After October's task of getting my big and little goals listed, I need to start taking steps towards making them come to fruition. I have picked up the camera again after a long spell, it felt good, right and I was at home. Other goals have steps that can be taken without costing $ so I will jump on them this coming week and month. We can only do to better ourselves, however small.

Where do you find your peace?

2009-10-26T19:00:00.010-04:00

These are a few of my favorite things. Things that bring me peace.

Books, especially Alexandra Stoddard books. I think there is probably no author who touches me creatively more than she does. I'm not a decorator and never will be. Whether or not my dining room china closet is Louis IV inspired or not I'll never know, that's not why I read her. When I figure out why, I'll let you know. Until then, I think she is brilliant and recommend her.

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Music - Cd's albums, cassette tapes, doesn't matter. I think if I could not hear music or read books, I would be miserable. So here is much gratitude that I am not losing my hearing or sight. I have quite a few friends who are musicians, so I am lucky that even when I go out and a national act that I love isn't anywhere playing in our town, I can pretty much be assured there is someone I know and enjoy playing downtown.

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A friend of mine asked something to the effect of "Do you ever feel like you have used all of God's favors?" the other day. I immediately replied "ALL THE TIME" Last night was a hard night for me, I was tearful and regretful, stems back from my inability to let things go and my wish that I could be better, give more, do more. I was UPSET. There's no use calling friends or family up to commiserate, I just needed to get it out, and I did. Then I was reminded, you need to forgive yourself and decide to move on. I'm not a real religious person, but last night I prayed, it seemed to help. I tried very hard to forgive myself. I woke this morning more at peace. It doesn't solve the problem as a whole, that will come, I know, but I felt better. I want to believe God doesn't run out of favors.

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Little bits - Today L and I went to Sweet Bay, Publix and CVS. We used coupons everywhere we went. I walked out of Sweet Bay with a glass jar of EVOO (extra virgin olive oil) normally priced at 5.67, 1 pound of butter quarters, a dozen eggs, and a 5lb bag of sugar for $1.19. Why? Because I used coupons. I am not so vain or shy that I can't use coupons, and you shouldn't be either. Why not use them if they let you use your real money on other things you need/want. I have no need for butter quarters, EVOO, or a 5lb bag of sugar, but my sister, an extraordinary cook and sometimes baker does, so I gave them to her. Little bits people, here and there, they add up to help one's budget, and in this case, one's happiness in helping.

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FYI - It's World Pasta Day today, hope you all found some gorgeous Fettuccine Alfredo or some Linguine Pesto to nosh on.. I completely forgot until dinnertime had well been over. Thinking I'll make up for it tomorrow :)

Disney, Being 4, The Collegiate, Work

2009-10-22T18:09:00.012-04:00

What is it about Disney that makes us 4-7 year old children again when we, as adults, go there with the kids? I don't know, but I don't fight it. Fiona, 4 years old.

To be 4 at Disney World is a magical thing. You aren't the jaded 7 year old who has seen it all, and knows everything. When Belle or Cinderella hugs you, it's A BIG DEAL, DUDE!!!
Pooh Bear, Eeyore, Tigger and Piglet invite you to breakfast? You can't say no to that!

I am a grown up. I am not 4. I cannot honestly tell you that when Aurora hugged me the first time I met her in my 30's, it wasn't a big deal. I cannot honestly tell you I didn't burst into tears like a big baby cause I was so happy. That would be a lie. I'm glad Fee had more composure and maturity to just curtsy at Belle. I am still waiting to meet Prince Phillip and Maleficent. Merriweather as well, she is my fave fairy. HINT HINT, Christopher, if you made that happen, that would be the biggest coup you ever pulled off. That would complete my Disney dream. I have been visiting Walt Disney World since the year it opened, even when we lived in other states, we came to FL to visit family, but we ALWAYS went to Disney World. I went to Disneyland when I lived in CA, but it didn't measure up (even though the castle was Sleeping Beauty's). We now live about 15 minutes away from the front gate of The Magic Kingdom. Once I am back in happy finances, this princess is getting herself an annual pass. You never know when you have baby cousins come to town... someone needs to take them there, why not me?

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Had lunch with this child today... took her white short formal dress up for her sorority induction ceremony later in the month, as well as some hoodies and long sleeve shirts, because "mom, it was freezing up here the other night!" Wanted to take her off campus for lunch, so we went to Panera, laughed a lot, drove, laughed some more, made plans for the holidays, laughed even more. I'm so happy she's doing well, she's involved in intramural sports, her volleyball team is in semi finals, her "sisters" seem to be nice people. She has a clear direction of where she wants to be and how and what it's going to take for her to get there. So much more of a grown up than I was at her age. Shoot, sometimes, she's more grown up than I am now. I was glad to catch up with her and I have a sneaky and great feeling that she was happy to have had some Chellie/Mommi time with me. Oh hey, heads up-Panera has a shortbread cookie that is so deceptively delish, the fat content I cannot begin to think about, but MY GOD, that was a wonderful cookie! That said, since we started back on program I've lost 2.6 pounds, the real weigh in is on Monday, I'll let you know what the outcome is.

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My interview with the cable company went well. I was there from 10 until 3 in the afternoon as I had two interviews and then they sent me for drug testing, that has to be a good sign, right? They said I would hear from them within 7-10 days depending on getting back the drug test and the references etc. There are many other people vying for positions, so I was happy to get as far as I did so soon. Here is praying that I do get this, because it will make Spring Semester so much less stressful for me, as well as maybe getting a start on really paying down debt. I leave you with the wish that you pray for me and mine and I will for you and yours.

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More Portraiture, Weighty Issues, Moving, Employment

2009-10-19T14:31:00.012-04:00

Top to bottom, Left to right - Josh Wilson, Brian Wood, Chris and a photo of me that was taken by Jan Gay. I was 21, almost 22 at that time. I would like to think that besides the weight, I haven't changed that much. The hair colors have changed over the years, the cut, but for the most part I'm the same. I started on Weight Watchers again today. I was at my heaviest about 3 months ago, I have since lost weight, but feel I need a kick start and points have always worked before so I thought why mess with a good thing. To be honest. I don't want or need to weigh 132, which is what I was in that photo, but I'd like to resemble myself a little more than I do now. So, as I go on, I will post what I've lost or gained once a week, here's to getting back to me :)

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I love black and white photography best. Now that I am digital, thank you Chris, I can just shoot in black and white or color and make changes from there. But I do love the starkness of it, the details seem to shine through more. I love the details.
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Last night, I moved back into my house. I'd been spending the last week at my parent's house. My sister is house sitting for them while they are on assignment in Virginia. It was nice to go grocery shopping and come home and clean house and get laundry done. A break from the day to day and same surroundings is good, but I did miss the house, much to my surprise. I had planned on moving out within a year of me getting another job as I just didn't feel like it was MINE, I share it with my sister when she isn't house sitting my parent's home, and although neither her or my stuff is all encompassing the space, it isn't mine. Plans that I thought were progressing nicely and towards this turned out not to be so full of progress, so I am still thinking on the move, but with different requirements this time, not as worried about how many bedrooms, location, etc as before. This also gives me more time to really get the place I want. I saw two locations today, haven't checked them out, but come closer to time, I will.

Have an interview tomorrow with a nationally known cable company, if it is successful I will be in training for 4-6 weeks(paid) and then the actual job starts. Free Cable, Internet and really low cost telephone service as well your standard medical/dental, vision, 401K, STD, LTD are inclusive in the benefits, so this, for all intensive purposes is the perfect job for me. Low stress, the hours are a little wonky, at the very worst I'd get the 3-11 shift, which for me isn't hard, because I'm up that late anyway, might as well be earning money while I'm up. I have two other positions that I applied for recently that have asked me to continue in the application process, so here's faith that something great will come out of all those. I'll let you know.

Portraiture

2009-10-17T22:34:00.022-04:00

Thought I would add some more of my portraiture in the blog this week, so here's the first installment. What I find behind the a lens is so different than what people think of themselves, more often than not. I love being able to show them a different view to themselves. A true view, make no mistake about that, but a different one how they perhaps never saw themselves. It brings me great joy to show a mother of a graduating high school boy the love in his eyes when is captured grabbing her for a hug, or the always serious couple caught laughing and it turns out to be their favorite shot. I don't claim to be Annie Lebowitz or Sam Jones or anybody. I'm just me, and the people I shoot are just themselves. I like it that way. I do get an opportunity now and then to shoot local and national musicians, and that is great fun, but in my heart I know portraiture is where I belong.

I think people forget that they used to be children when they think about getting photographs taken. They seem surprised at the width of their own smiles, or how shiny their eyes are. That makes me smile. They seem to lose inhibitions about 25-50 shots into a shoot and then the real fun starts.

Then there are some people who are naturals when it comes to being in front of a camera. They have no qualms about the crows feet or the crooked tooth. No hangups about anything you ask them to do. Then you have those people who are so beautiful in life, you think you can't possibly do them any more justice in film, but even then they find something that they hadn't seen in themselves. Then there's children, they are so unpredictable, but that's almost the very best part of photographing them. I can't imagine everyone not wanting to do this. I am none happier than when I get to photograph people. I, however absolutely HATE having my own picture taken. It's a weight issue, my eyes bother me, believe me, I can come up with a million reasons, so don't bother trying. I'll just stay behind here, thanks, it will benefit us both that way.

If you were asked to pose for a photo, what would your reaction be. I mean really, think about it. most of us shy away. I'm going to try and not do it so often, even if I only use those images as stepping stones to how I want to look in a few more months when I have lost the weight I aim to lose.

The true victory for me will be when I can have a photo taken of me where I am not having my hands under my chin (double chin) and my eyes are open wider and focused better on the photographer/camera. I leave you with the thought that no matter how we see ourselves, there will always be other people who see us so differently than us. We can learn so much from that. Beauty is not just what's on the surface, that's the superficial, yes there are beautiful and striking features that some people possess, but real beauty is ALWAYS in the details. The eyes, the crinkles around your nose when you smile, that scar you got as a child whilst roller skating, the birthmark, the dirt beneath a boys fingernails after he's been playing in the mud with the trucks, the ribbons on an Easter dress, the way a son looks at his mother, the way a woman looks at the man she loves, the way a child holds their parents hand. That, my friend, is beauty and you have it. It's always been there. All you have to do is look.

Oh What a week it was

2009-10-17T14:38:00.014-04:00

Wow, it seems like I've been away much longer than a week, but my what a week it was! Started Holiday shopping. I am a crazy woman when it comes to Christmas. It is my fave holiday and it is imperative to me to have my family around on Christmas morning. If I have to work Christmas later in the day that's fine, but don't even try and mess with my Christmas morning. My mother is the most difficult person to shop for.

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That child (Chelsea) came home from school, we went shopping, saw Toy Story 1&2 which we both laughed so hard through and thoroughly enjoyed, and a lovely period piece called Bright Star about the poet Keats. I was surprised how much I enjoyed it. Chels loves Keats so for her it was brilliant. I love this photo. It was at the Renaissance Faire in Maryland. It's one of the largest fairs in the country and we loved going there each season. She must have been in 5th or 6th grade here.

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I got three, yes count them, three job calls. I won't jinx it by talking about them now, but I was ecstatic that I got the calls. Interviews scheduled for this coming week.

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My mother is due to come home end of month. YAY! Her freelance contract is up. BOO! My father will be home for Christmas and then he returns back to VA for his contract. Chelsea leaves for school tomorrow night, will be back for Thanksgiving. This is Chelsea's graduation in June of this year. My dad is so proud, he's about to pop! I think it's fun to see the way they interact with her as opposed to the way they did with myself and my sister. It's just so different. I guess it's true what they say "When you have your own children you'll understand..."

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It's a beautiful day here. After having such horrid heat for October, 93, but feels like 100 with the heat index, this morning called for a high of 75. Tomorrow the high is 70-72. Now THIS is my kind of weather. I still miss the colors of Fall back up north, but I don't miss the freezing cold, snow or ice. That said, I can't stand the heat here or up north so.. I know, there's no pleasing me :)

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If you do NOTHING else this week, you must watch The Big Bang Theory. Why? Because Wil Wheaton is going to be guest starring on it. Need more coaxing? here: http://wilwheaton.typepad.com/wwdnbackup/2009/10/hey-look-its-the-promo-for-my-episode-of-the-big-bang-theory.html I love his wit and this show anyway so for me, it's Cake :) In fact, you need to watch all the shows on CBS' Monday night lineup. It's so worth it!

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Off to try and make up the next week's shopping list, which I think will be much different than last weeks as it will not have "Chelsea food" on it. I might see the laundry room later tonight, but I'm not counting on it :) and last but not least, today's installment of THINGS YOU SHOULD KNOW SO YOU CAN SLEEP TONIGHT : Chris Pine (James T. Kirk from the newest Star Trek) is working his way up to playing another icon, novelist Tom Clancy's heroic Jack Ryan.According to Variety, Pine is in early negotiations with Paramount to reboot a series that kicked off in 1990, with Alec Baldwin playing the CIA operative in 'The Hunt for Red October.' I leave you with that.

The Restlessness and a Story of Toys

2009-10-12T15:08:00.007-04:00

Restless tonight, cause I wasted the light... this is the best way to describe the way I feel today. I feel like I want to crawl out of my skin and do/go/be/have/fix something, somewhere, somehow. I get like this and for the most part my inclination leads me into trouble. I spend too much money, I eat too many sweets, I stay up too late, I go out and party too hard, you get the picture. Last night, Meg, Chel and I went to see Cloudy With A Chance Of Meatballs, then had dinner at Market Street before Meggie had to catch up with some other friends and leave this morning to go back home. We had fun and as we were watching the movie I thought to myself 'this is only the second time you have been out out in two or three months.' So I mourn the days when I could hop in the car and be at the Club with the girls or the Pub with a group of friendly people, or even a movie more often with Chris, but the way things are financially, the distance between suburbia and "the city" that can't be justified in my mind for a marginal musician I would only see if I lived ten minutes from the pub, and the work schedules of some of my friends have been sent to sabotage my social life. I didn't and still don't feel like I can just go out and have a good time without footing my share of the bill. I don't like being indebted to other people even if it's just over a round of beer or a cover charge, so I just stopped going out. Once I'm working again, it will be easier for me to justify the expense of seeing live music with friends, having a happy hour meet up, and or doing a pub crawl. Until then, my jaunts, unfortunately, are going to have to be far and in between.

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There's no mail today as it's Columbus Day. This brings me no joy. Getting mail, for the most part is like Christmas! I love opening my box to see a new issue of a magazine I love, or, now that it's close to the holidays, what catalogue am I in store for today? Yes, there will always be bills in our boxes, there's no stopping that, but the other stuff is what makes it fun! I can look at it like this though, tomorrow's mail will be even more awesome because it will be two day's worth.

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Is it silly for a 42 year old woman to be THIS excited about seeing Toy Story 1&2 3-D as a double feature? They say that in intermission, there is Toy Story trivia... I can't wait! I love the Slinky Dog, and Rex is awesome, I think he may be my favorite. I didn't care for TS2 as much as TS1 because I didn't like Jesse. Mind you, I love Joan Cusak in all her other stuff. I can sit through it again though. TS3 is coming soon, June 18th 2010 is the date I heard. Woody, Buzz, and the rest of their toy-box friends are dumped in a day-care center after their owner Andy departs for college. Already, the movie trailer has some cute quotes: Hamm the Piggy Bank: C'mon, let's see how much we're going for on eBay...

There is light at the end of the tunnel

2009-10-08T11:34:00.008-04:00

Baby girl is coming home on Friday night. She is going to hit the Homecoming game at CHS, and then goes back up to Uni to lifeguard a swim meet, then comes back home for Fall break. A full 9 days with her home. Mind you, as most kids her age, she will either be sleeping or seeing friends for most of the time, but the she also scored some hours at her summer job whilst on break so go her! I have been doing extremely well not being a helicopter mommi. You know the hovering mommi that calls three times a week and knows the professor's names by heart, etc. We text once a week or so, call once a week or so, (in fact, I just got off the phone with her) and if need be, she or I can see each other with an hour's drive. I'll be happy to see her, but L's right, I drew up a grocery list because nowadays, there's nothing in the house that child will eat. We went shopping and I think once she's here, we'll end up going again.
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Saw Inglorious Basterds and Zombieland over the weekend. Classic Tarantino was Basterds and I actually enjoyed it more than his previous and most recent films. Zombieland was gorier than I needed but fun nevertheless especially with the Ghostbusters references and Bill Murray. I recommend them both. Perhaps not just after eating, however. Also watched Blade and The Prestige. Blade because I love Norman Reedus. The Prestige, because a) Christian Bale and b)Hugh Jackman, or as The Bear likes to say"Batman and Wolverine". I love Christian Bale, and this movie was just so wonderfully shot and the story was so incredible. really a brilliant film.
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All things are pointing to a "yes" on my unemployment benefits coming again.
After much delay and the extended benefits bill coming into effect, I have some hope of actually, oh, I don't know, putting a little money aside again. Bills have been paid, because let's face it, when aren't the big ones, the important ones, paid. But I gave up cable and a land line to make things easier. To tell you the truth. I don't miss the land line. Cable, now that's a whole different story. That, I may have to succumb to again. I have been looking for jobs right left and center. The problem is that FL unemployment is at something like 10.25% right now and there is an overabundance of Administrative professionals. One could say "Col, so just don't be an admin, do something else... shoot anyone can work retail, hotel, waitress..." well apparently not, because I applied. let me tell you, even what you may think are blue collar jobs that you or I could do with our hands tied behind our backs, WE CAN'T. I would be happy to be , and may I add, have been, a proud blue collar worker, but those jobs are filled as well. I'll continue to apply and will most likely get an interview for every 20 I apply for, but I will keep looking. Would love to get back to normalcy.
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I leave you with the fact that Pam and Jim's wedding is tonight on The Office and Community is a great show and you should already know all that, go, eat dinner, watch the wedding. it'll be the first one I've looked forward to since Princess Diana's.

Addictions

2009-10-05T18:15:00.002-04:00

I've been drinking Diet Coke for as long as I care to remember. They say it's a mother's/housewives addiction, like perhaps Prozac. Except Diet Coke has caffeine and I am under the impression (as I, myself, do not take the medication)that Prozac does not. I am not affected by the caffeine in Diet Coke, so it can't really be justified as my high octane kick in the rear every morning in the vein that coffee is for some people. No, my addiction to Diet Coke stems from the fountain sort, the bubbles, the taste. Let me tell you now there is a HUGE difference in the taste of a fountain Diet Coke and a can or bottle. I rarely drink anymore, I don't smoke, I just bite my nails, read way too many magazines and drink Diet Coke in copious amounts. These are my vices, I say leave me to them :)

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Taking my sister to the airport tomorrow, she's going up east to see a musician friend of hers who only comes to the states to play once in a blue moon. I'll be picking her up on Wednesday as well. I remember just getting the car and following a band for a small weekend. This is not what she is doing, but it reminded me of many road trips and set-ups and take downs and drums bigger than my head and tea in thermoses and late night/early morning Silver Diner and Denny's runs. For some people it's sports, some people it's Star Trek, me, it's always been about the music. You take me places whilst you are onstage, and I will GO places to see you. I miss those days. I miss good live music. We're lucky here in Florida, not only for great venues for national acts to play but also for the plethora of great local musicians we have and their amazing sense of community here. That is another post altogether. I tell you, people, music, it can change you.

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Watched two pivotal movies this weekend. The first was Boondock Saints with Sean Patrick Flanery (left) and Norman Reedus(right), also starring Billy Connolly whom I adore. I'm a huge sucker for good Irish Catholic Boston boys, so this was a win from the first time I saw it back in the day. I came to it later than it was released, but now I don't know how a film fanatic couldn't have it in their library. Its message is a good one, albeit not carried out in the best and certainly not the most legal way perhaps, but it's still a good message. It doesn't hurt that Flanery's accent is superb, the Irish, not so much the Boston. The other was Rob Roy. Scotland, as far as I am concerned is my second home, so this was not only a gorgeous movie to watch, it was compelling and again a good message. Honor made him a man. Courage made him a hero. History made him a Legend. I know that's the corny tag line for the movie, but it's true. Braveheart is my favorite movie, but this ranks right there in the top five. Liam Neeson, who can do no wrong as far as I'm concerned and the goddess Jessica Lange, who plays Roy's wife Mary with such a presence and dignified grace, it wrecks me how much I love this movie.

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The house is filling up with the smell of Pesto Pasta and it is amazing. My sister, I think in the knowledge that I'm quite happy to eat just cereal, cheese and good bread all my life, is making us dinner. It's not that I don't know how. I just have rare call to make myself a full on meal. So, I am thankful, my tummy will be warm, my nose happy, and my mouth wanting seconds, no doubt :) ETA - it was Delish!

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I leave you with the thoughts of warm full tummies and HOW I MET YOUR MOTHER AND BIG BANG THEORY :)

October mornings filled with music

2009-10-01T09:39:00.010-04:00

"October, the trees are stripped bare from all they wear, what do I care? October, kingdoms rise and kingdoms fall, but you go on and on... you go on." October by U2. Photo by Bruce Doucet.
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So October is about going on and on in the midst of it all. I'm totally down with that.
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Tuition - paid. Job -not yet in hand. Chel's grades - All good. Treadmill today - done. The weather even cooperated.
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Things to look forward to this month:
1. Meg coming down from up North, if I get to see her at some point great, if not it's still ok, I'll talk to her soon.

2. Southern Women's Show at the convention center. It's so funny to go and be like OMG! and people watch. Well, there's also fun shopping and stuff, so that's good.

3. Chels is home for a full week, FALL BREAK.

4. Lots of shows, local people playing out, some national acts coming, if I'm able to see a few then even better! Our Lady Peace, Joshua Radin, The Bravery,The Cult, Roger Freaking Daltrey!, Local shows, That, my friend, is what is on my mind... All a big yay! We are so lucky to have decent venues for people to play.

6. Boondock Saints 2, All Saints Day

7. Last but most definitely not least, It is WORLD PASTA DAY on October 26th and you know me and PASTA! Woot Woot!
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All in all, I wish you everyone a BRILLIANT BRILLIANT OCTOBER.

In the BROADest sense of the word...

2009-09-30T16:13:00.000-04:00

See that face? That face is the face I make when I don't get my way, but not in a tantrum kind of way. The face that I make when things are Topsy turvy and I feel like I have no control over their outcome. It's also the face of determination, perseverance and is the nicest way I can say "Screw that, I'm DOING this." If you knew me back in the day, high school, after that some, you've more than likely been a recipient of that face. I don't do NO well. Eventually, though, it happens, things sort themselves out and I stop looking like that. It's Katherine Hepburn, a Vanity Fair shot. She was a broad, much in the way that Lauren Bacall, Kathleen Turner, Stockard Channing, Susan Sarandon, Rachel Weisz and Diane Lane are. Yes, those are my heroes, BROAD wise. They don't do things they don't believe in. THAT, my friends is the key. Where is the line you draw that says, 'yeah, no, not gonna happen.' What I love about being a broad is that most of the time I am on top of the balance that is strong and still feminine at the same time. I think strong women are a necessity and a wonder in this age. My generation birthed many. We are lucky, because the things we teach our children, nieces, and nephews will carry on. I am trying something, WWDD, "What would Diane do?" over the next few days, and see if it makes the difference in my dealings. I'm sure it will. When I feel confident, I can do ANYTHING, and I feel like the power that is the BROAD in me is overflowing today. The interview went so well. I was so pleased. I also applied for two other administrative positions within the company, so we'll see what happens.

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I'll tell you what Diane would do with the cleaning that needed to be done around my house. She would have made her kids pitch in and help. My kid is away. Master Bathroom, Dishwasher, Master Bedroom, you were overcome.

State of Play here

2009-09-29T15:30:00.006-04:00

So, to answer your question, yes, I feel better after having seen Chels. How can you not? I mean look at her. Photo from Sr. Prom, edited out Eric, boyfriend at the time. Will tuition get paid? Of course it will. Will I get a job soon? Of course I will. It's the feeling of 'ok my role as an employee is non-existent, my role as a mother has diminished greatly', and because I define myself so much with those two roles, I forget that there are other roles in my life. Will my life be like a half hour family sitcom where all gets resolved to the good in thirty minutes? No. it most definitely will not, but you know what, that's ok. I am one of the strongest lionesses I know. My daughter thinks I can move mountains, beat the crap out of people who upset me and mine (figuratively of course..), make the impossible, possible. Who am I to change her way of thinking? It's like that saying "Be the person your children think you are" My sister of course is another lioness, as is my mother in her own quiet way. I have raised, with the help of those two, another fierce woman. We should ALL be proud. She looked happy. Rush went well, she found three sororities she is interested in but two mainly are her focus. Saturday is BID day, until then they keep going to different events at the different houses. If she decides to do it, YAY, if not, that's ok too. I just want her to experience all that college has to offer academically as well as socially in her own way.
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Treadmill tomorrow, back on track. I have to do it first thing in the morning or it's just not going to happen. I also have my interview at 10 so I think 7:30, Monsieur treadmill and I have a date.
I would like to see another 6/7 pounds gone in October, so here's to it!
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Some of you may not realize it, but by and far this past year has been probably the worst year of my life on a personal level. I say that because me being out of work allowed me to be there for Chelsea in her last year of high school, around to get her ready to go off to college, available for a last minute up and down the East Coast road trip and I wouldn't have changed a thing if it meant losing all that. It also allowed me to be available when my father had a stroke and lost the ability to use his right hand and most of the use of his right side in general, thus making him unable to drive anywhere. At the same time, my mother also had health problems, on a much smaller scale, but problems nonetheless and I was able to assist with both of their physical therapy schedules, Dr.'s visits, grocery shopping, paying bills, etc. It was time well spent as well because my relationship with my parents, especially my father has not always been the best. This brought us closer and I found that my mother is quite awesome! On every other level however, including my own health, I was out with meningitis for 3 months, obviously financially and career wise, it has been disastrous. So, I give you the new mantra. Voila, not pretty but I just have to keep reminding myself... this too shall pass.
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WARNING, yes you have been let into the pity party.

2009-09-29T10:24:00.006-04:00

I too have become Uncomfortably Numb. Another friend says this is the equivalent of being a functioning alcoholic. Hullo, my name is Collette and I am a REALLY good comfortably numb person. Where's the 12-step for that? I feel like I'm going to throw up. My head is pounding, I am dizzy, and it's a nauseating numbness, not a dream state numbness that some people have. I have to drive an hour away to have lunch with, and be all lovely to, my daughter who is at Uni and unaware of the numbness. That is how it will remain. The last thing I need is to have her stressing out over me whilst trying to deal with all the other stuff at Uni. If she knew I was worried about the unemployment, the state of the bank account, the tuition, the (insert another worry - go ahead, you choose) then she wouldn't be able to concentrate on the prize at hand which of course, is her education. She's worked so hard to get where she is, I can't let me not working and the outcome of that affect her focus.

I'm not out to impress people with anything, I'm not about keeping up with the Jones's or BEING the Jones'. I don't think I ever have been. I just want to be able to pay my bills, give my child the education she deserves, and be able to go to the Doctor when I need to. It's not much to ask, really, it isn't. If I thought that God was an unforgiving God or a vengeful God, I would believe that this is payback for all the really horrible things I've done in my life and then it would be justifiable. I have to believe otherwise. I have to.

Leaving for lunch with Chelsea. I'll feel better later, promise.

Cooking? Do you mean bung it in the oven?, and Friends,

2009-09-28T11:23:00.001-04:00

Yesterday my sister was in the kitchen making up a batch of stuff for her lunches/dinners next week. She is a fun cook, she chops and slices and dices and sautes till the house is brimming with the smells of homemade goodness. I don't even eat half the stuff she makes, but MY GOD, did the house smell yummy! I wish I was that adventurous in the kitchen. Oh sure, I can bake with the best of them, but actual cooking? I still don't have a hold on. My mother cooked until I was 13, then we had a cook from the time I was 13-15, then my mother cooked again, then 15-18 we had a cook. 18-onward, Stouffer's and Lean Cuisine and the odd days here and there I would attempt cooking, but for the most part, I was pre-packaged, add a salad sometimes, and get on with it girl. I'm going to try my hand at this cooking thing again. Last week's chili was fantabulous if I do say so myself and even though I'm only cooking for one, Chel's not home, L doesn't live with me, it will still be fun and think of all the leftovers, so I won't be out buying fast food.

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Sunday - It was a Sybil day. Dark and blustery one minute, sun shining like all get out the next. Time to get under covers and read a book. I would if I wasn't going to clean house when I get home, but I do hope this signals the beginning of real Fall here in FL. They say April and May constitutes rainy season. I just want some semblance of Fall.

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“To like many people spontaneously and without effort is perhaps the greatest of all sources of personal happiness.” I try and automatically give people I meet a clean slate. Benefit of the doubt that they will be awesomely nice people if you will. I have been bitten in the butt more often than not. Does this change my perspective on how to approach a new person, friend or acquaintance? No. I try and be a positive part of friend's lives. I figure we all have stuff going on that to us is major/big/stressful. Why add to the negativity? This doesn't always work with my own family though. I think that with family you feel safe and so the least bit of negativity may come out harsher because you feel safe to express it there. I am sincere in my hope for people to have BRILLIANT days. I am working on keeping things positive, even when surrounded by what, at the time seems like insurmountable odds. I hope that even those who I don't see as often as I would like due to some reason or another, realize that I still try and bring some light into their lives even if only via facebook, im's, texts or email. I am hopeful that the light they bring me shines back at them tenfold.

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Interview this morning went well. Wednesday I meet with the actual person I would be supporting, so that will be fun. Tomorrow, lunch with Chelsea, I'm taking her up an ethernet cord for her Mac. Today, Y'all have a BRILLIANT BRILLIANT day.

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Movietimes, Oliver, WHO ARE YOU?, The weigh it is...

2009-09-26T17:32:00.010-04:00

Chels made it home Friday night, too late really for us to catch a flick so we decided to catch movies today. Saw "9" and "Julie and Julia". Both were good. I would have seen "9" even if it had gotten terrible reviews, because Elijah Wood is the main character. I would have seen "Julie and Julia" as well because I love Meryl Streep. I also got to spend the day with Chels. WIN WIN WIN :)
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You know it's time to rethink your friends when you get a text message that states " My time in FL is almost up as I will be at sea w/Royal Caribbean, Love to see everyone one more time before I leave. Free next Saturday, having a blowout at Backstage Billiards in LBV starts at 8 and we'll close it down", and you have no idea who sent it to you. All the numbers in my cell have names attached to them. I have so many friends who are performers and in hospitality in general, and people change cells all the time, so the confusion is understandable. Here's the thing though, someone took the time to invite me, I feel bad a)not knowing who it is and b)RSVP'ng to a blind number. I thought other friends would know something about it but no one seems to be saying that they will be at the event. I think we should show up blindly and hope for the best. That way, no one's feelings are hurt we didn't show and at the same time, I find out who the person is AND I get to play Pool, which I love to do. Lame, I know. Don't judge, it could happen to you.
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I am addicted to http://www.apartmenttherapy.com/ . I am jonezing to move out anyway and then top it off with all these ideas in one small site... argghh. Addicted I tell you!
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It's raining now, a gorgeous thick rain. Of course my mind thinks, rain, dark outside, why aren't you in bed?
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I haven't been blogging about it because it makes me sad, but I am waaaaay bigger than I want/should be. I have been making small steps to change that and to my delight, it's paying off. This week, I lost two pounds. No, it's not Biggest Loser material, but that makes a total of 6.2 pounds this month and I still have a few days left in the month. I'm happy that it's making a difference. It's not just about the treadmill, it's about the intake.

Limiting the crap and adding good. It's not rocket science, I really don't see why it's taken me this long to understand it. I'm not on program (Weight Watchers), I'm just using my head. Am I still going to have a Twistee Treat Butterscotch and Caramel Sundae when I want? You can bet on it. Am I going to beat myself up over it the next day? Not a chance. I have a goal in mind and a "carrot" to wave in front of me, as I do well when given incentives, so I foresee success.
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I don't know about you but Sunday is calling my name. Sundays here mean a leisurely wake up, an indulgent breakky and the paper. I savor the paper, and read almost every section except sports, because really, I don't care. At all. Unless of course it's College Basketball season. Go Duke. I have no affiliation educationally to Duke. It's all Christan Laetner's fault, just like my love for University of Maryland is Boomer Esiason's fault. I didn't graduate from either school. But I digress

Metal and hair, I mean really... what else is there? LOL

2009-09-23T08:42:00.010-04:00

This morning I wake up and hear two things. 1) Sebastian Bach, (stock photo) you know him, "18 and Life," "I Remember You," the singer who kicks almost every other metal vocalist out the door, the guy who IS Skid Row? Yes, NOW you remember him. Well, he's going to be ion VH-1 Celebrity Fit Club. The man looked like he needed an intraveneous drip back in the day. I guess it hits us all at some point. 2) "Mmm-Bop" was on my radio, like as in Hanson. Time to change the station settings. Time to wonder if I should go back to bed. It's strange; I find my radio settings are starting to dial further up. I have some classic rock (think 70's), a mix (late 60's, 70's, 80's, 90's and today), Christian Contemporary (DC Talk, Michael W. Smith, Jars of Clay, Third Day, Barlow Girl, Jeremy Camp, etc.), talk radio, and a station that seems to play a lot of stuff Chels likes. Next car is coming equipped with Sirius or XM because I like the idea of having an ALL 80's station or Elvis 24/7 at my will (which, you'll be happy to hear, will NEVER happen, but it's nice to know I could make it happen if I wanted to).
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Treadmill: 30 minutes-defeated that machine -- YAY!
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I am half way through the Rubbermaid tub of papers to cull. It was cathartic throwing things away. Will do the rest tonight while I watch my guilty pleasure true crime shows... unless of course L pummels me to death with the remote to watch Mythbusters or a new Top Gear (you never know, it can happen...).
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Prepped the hair for the dyeing tomorrow. Friday I have two, count 'em, two interviews so I wanted the hair sorted prior. Friday is also when the Chels is coming home WHOOT WHOOT! Trust me when I tell you Loreal for True Brunettes (if indeed you ARE a brunette) is your best friend until you can actually get to your regular stylist for a dye job or highlights. This made my hair thicker, the highlights were like caramel, butterscotch and honey all rolled into my natural color and I was more than thrilled with the results. It usually runs in the $10-12 range, but with coupons (and come on, when DON'T I have coupons), and a good Target sale, I can, and in this case, did, get it for $6.99. Love, lurve, LUV it and recommend it to all. To the point where I would even say pay the retail $10-12 - it's worth it and so are you.

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Lita Ford (stock photo) is on my XM radio right this second, singing "Kiss Me Deadly." This is a fitting way to end the post, as we started with The Vox of Metal, Sebastian Bach. :)

Order and Light

2009-09-22T08:15:00.000-04:00

Happy Fall Solstice!
The House of Blues, Orlando has two for 1 tickets, $10.13 plus tax, available to the The Psychedelic Furs/Happy Mondays show. As much as I know I can sit through and enjoy Richard Butler, I cannot at all enjoy aging bovver boy Shaun Ryder and because I don't know who is opening for who...I pass.
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Last night did a list of lists, (stock photo) ended up with 250 things I want to do before I die. I guess that means it's a bucket list. I'm sure there is more, but that was a great start. It was fun and things were in no apparent order and some things I can't do now due to financial concerns (set up a scholarship in Chel's name at FSC for single parent children who need financial aid) or because the people don't exist yet, (Grandchildren), but I am going to make a big run at the list. I mean I must have at least another 42 years I reckon, if not more as only the good die young.
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Chel comes home on Friday for the weekend. We live an hour away from the university so she felt it was just silly for me to drive up for parent's weekend. We'd rather be here and go to the movies and chill mother/daughter anyway. I'm excited to see her. Just got off the phone with her and she seems good except for roommate problems, cramped quarters will do that to you. If I had my way she would have gotten a larger room or more roommates, it's difficult when there's just two of you. Also, I'm going to have her go through her stuff and decide really what she wants to get rid of because I need to get started on this culling in the house.
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The treadmill, alas, did not happen. Other stuff is though. Those folders we bought at Target? Being utilized this evening. I am purging every slip of paper that is in a big old Rubbermaid tub and sorting it into HOUSE DECOR, TRAVEL, FASHION, PRESSIES, FINANCIAL, PHOTOGRAPHY, and FITNESS categories, and they each get a folder. I feel uber organized just looking at it all and I haven't even started the actual purge. I know it sounds ridiculous coming out of my mouth when I say it but "I can't create under these circumstances" or "I can't even think in here" is true when I have disorder around me visually. I'm not anal and I'm certainly not BREE from Desperate Housewives as far as the house being spotless, but I need order. This is a good start on it. Kicking away...

The ramblings, foodings, projects...

2009-09-21T11:00:00.002-04:00

Roofers showed up this morning at 8:30 to finish up. I hope I get my house back before 5.
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“What a wonderful life I’ve had! I only wish I’d realized it sooner.” Colette
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Made Chili (stock photo-my memory card was over at moms house) over the weekend. Was very happy till I realized I had forgotten the green, red, and yellow pepper mix.. it still tasted amazing, just the right kick to it without melting my face off... love comfort food, I think the next project is 5 cheese mac and cheese.
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Target was having AMAZING clearance on some school supplies and although Chel is sorted, I needed some accordian files to corrall all the culled articles and or pressie ideas I liked, so L and I went (she to get Starbucks- it's our closest one and I to grab the files). I don't know how other people are able to file or organize their mags and or articles/pages they want to keep, but this seems to work for us. Walked out with 4 for $7.50 and she treated, so that was lovely of her! SO many other goregous things I wanted to pick up, but house shopping not on the agenda yet, so... back home we went.
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I start treadmilling again tomorrow. This is not something I am looking forward to. My other alternative is to give up bread and Diet Coke altogether. So you understand, then....
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Lunch will be Chili. Dinner will be Pasta Primavera, me thinks, with some gorgeous crusty artisan sourdough bread, salivating just thinking about it, now. I'm actually getting all these cravings out of my system becase as I said, tomorrow is D day for this tummy and it's evil mignons, my arms... and it's a lost cause... because now, I really AM quite hungry - Lunch it is...

House vs. Apartment

2009-09-19T12:52:00.000-04:00

When you make the decision to live in a house as opposed to living in an apartment, there are likely things you have considered. You may have decided that you just cannot deal with the noise of feet above you at 6 in the morning, or that having to find parking near your actual building is getting to be a bit tedious. I think sometimes those feelings may override the ones that should be brought to your attention when you are thinking about a house. A house brings all sorts of other things to think and be bothered with like, lawn maintenance, I don't cut my lawn, a service does, but now that I'm not working, I can't afford to have him come as often as he used to and thus, my lawn is less than stellar. A house, especially one you choose to rent because you were only going to be there till after your daughter finished high school, has a landlord. Landlords are a strange duck. My particular one hasn't raised our rent in 4 years. I don't see him doing so, I think he's just so happy to have someone in the house in this economy. That said, this house leaves a lot to be desired. We recently had no dishwasher for a month while he was shopping around for one. My disposal is still broken. The roof began to leak in late July. It's just now mid September and roofers are here to fix it TODAY. Stock photo. The delay? The landlord was negotiating with insurance to pay for it. In the mean, I had tarp on my roof. My sister and I share the house and she for one doesn't want to move. Once I am working again and probably in about a year, I will be moving. It's time. I want to decorate my own place again, have parties again, etc. I could in this house, but it just doesn't feel like mine. I won't ever buy a house, been there, seen that, not interested. Even if it's an apartment or a condo I choose this next time, it's mine and SOMEONE else can deal with the roof and the lawn and all the silliness that is "estate maintenance".
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The Forces that listen and Chels

2009-09-18T20:59:00.001-04:00

It was as if some unknown force heard me this morning... I arrived at the house to pick up mail and in a box was a lavender candle I had won and completely forgotten about. The smell when opening the box was overwhelming and just took me to a good place. So I couldn't go to Provence today, Provence came to me.... Steven Mitchell's painting is a good representation of where I felt I must have been when I opened the box. It was a good thing as well, because a few hours before Chelsea had called from University to say her car battery had died and that she was at the Autozone to get a new one but wanted to check in with me before she actually bought one to see what prices should be etc. I thought 2 things: 1) She is so much more mature than I was 18, already being at the shop, shook up a bit, but still had the wherewithal to get a jump from Safety Dept at school and then go to the shop and 2) She called me to get advice... so YAY for being Super Mommy. (I call myself that when my 18 year old still calls me because she misses me or needs me to give a hug etc...) This day found me in shambles, emotions ran high all day long be they good or bad, they were THERE BIG TIME.

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This evening I picked up a roll of film that I found and had dropped off at Walgreens. I haven't used film in so long and had NO IDEA what was going to be on this roll. I was surprised it was a roll from October 2005, a Halloween party that Chelsea's youth group at church had. She dressed up as a housewife, robe curlers in hair and all... it was just so strange to see her so young. It brought back good memories and then made me think of how proud I am of who she has become. I'm such a big glumph when it comes to her. Everything inside me wanted to drive up to Lakeland today and handle the whole battery thing for her, but I knew she could do it and she did. I will just take solace in the knowledge that I prepared her enough to take control of situations like that even if they do surprise her, she still can conquer whatever comes her way. This photo was from before Senior Prom. Got her at Lakeside, before Eric (the boyfriend at the time) and she went to The Tavern for Pre Prom Dinner. Lucky I am, I just need to keep reminding myself.

In a bed of warm

2009-09-18T08:15:00.000-04:00

My horoscope today said to find or imagine myself in a field of purple. I can think of hardly anything better. Jennifer Vranes painting "Summer Shadows" feels like it would be a brilliant place to be. My horoscope also says it is a "Power day" for me... I don't feel powerful. At all. In any aspect of my life. I don't think people realize that being unemployed is just as much if not more stressful than working at a crap job, that being unemployed, you are busy even when you're not behind a desk all day. Here's the other thing, you feel powerless. It's hard for everyone in this economy, I know, so I'm not pity partying just me. Although the quiet and dark of my bed seems just lovely right now. So, today I welcome an opportunity to go lay on a blanket in the field of purple and let the sun hit my back.

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In other news, "Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle."-Philo-

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The shopping, the nostalgia, the rambling, oh my!

2009-09-16T18:17:00.001-04:00

(image - catinsosa) knows what I mean about stretching that dollar! Target and Walgreens roundup today, not my best work, but it was a good day.

Armed with my trusty coupons, my ever present Diet Coke and $....

I won't bore you with the details of the two transactions, just that Walgreens- I walked out with $27.92 worth of stuff for $4.68. Target was not as great but I'm happy because I got some things I needed and HAIR COLOUR (oh yes, my friends, IT'S TIME). Walked out of Target with $25.02 worth of stuff for $11.88. All in all not a bad trip. The woman who checked me out at Customer Service in Target was so awesome, I even left a "customer appreciation" card for her manager to put in her file for when performance evaluations come up. Groceries tomorrow.

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I was feeling nostalgic the other day, I thought about how fun it would be to see FDR's production of Grease. I put the call out for any of my classmates who may have a copy of the show on VHS (as that's all there was back in the day, kiddies) to please let me know if they could copy it and ship it to me if paid for the duplication and shipping. So far only JF thinks his mom and dad may still have the old tape. I hope so. It'd be a shame if we all lost ours. Voila, Stockard Channing as Betty Rizzo. (Stock Studio photo) Given my druthers and perhaps a different path choosen, I would have hoped my foray into musical theatre/acting would have taken my 1/4 as far as that woman. I think she is a brilliant actress and as the First Lady on The West Wing she was outstanding. I joke with my own parents that if they weren't available, that Abbey and Jed Bartlett (Stockard Channing and Martin Sheen) would have been my parents of choosing.

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It's a dark quiet night here. I think it wants to rain and everything in me says snuggle up in bed and read a good book. I've decided that Chili needs to be made in the very near future. I LOVE chili. Giant grocery store in Maryland has the best chili, failing homemade of course. Wendy's when it's not all liquidy is good as well. Me, I like a variety of black, red beans, corn, peppers, garlic, oregano, chili powder, you know... the usual, but I also add a little bbq beans (shh. don't tell...)to it as well, just to get a smokier flavour. Some people like it with ground beef, I can have it either that way OR vegetarian. It's brilliant with cornbread. so yes, there will be Chili.

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Tomorrow - Groceries, the beginning of the media culling, OMG! I'm opening up the desk drawers that must never be opened (you know the one with all those bits and bobs we all accumulate throughout the year), if I find anything coolio, I'll let you know:) Till then!

and the New Year begins

2009-09-15T08:36:00.001-04:00

BRILLIANT birthday weekend. L and I went to PSB on Friday night. I went movie crazy, crashed, and Sunday morning L and I went to Tampa and Sunday night Chels came home to surprise me and we went to dinner. Monday (the actual birthday) I had an interview at 9 that went swimmingly... washed bed linens, Thanks to natasha11 for the image.
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This is what I officially consider the New Year, break out a new notebook... those of you who know me, I'm never without my notebook(s). Time to color the hair again, start the treadmill routine again, I like to start the September clear. So, I have my shiny clean purple notebook and a fave pen, off to take over the world!

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Colin Farrell is procreating again - that can't be a bad thing.

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I'm sure someone more astute than Ally Sheedy said it first but she recently said "The only constant in my life is change. " I loved that and find it hits close to home.

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Fall is coming. I can't be happier. If I had my way, it would be September, October, November all year round... I don't care for the heat of Summer or the cold of Winter... so I'm kind of like baby bear of Goldilocks and the Three Bears... I want things "just right" and it's never more right than Fall as far as I'm concerned... Fall means plaid to me, wool, fires, slow cooker comfort food, all good things.

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Started updating the house. Took down a photo of Chelsea in Leicester Square taking photos of pigeons and put up a framed copy of a painting that states simply "I love you every day", put up some of my own photography, started really looking at books and videos that need culling. Much to do on the punch lists and why not start looking seriously at the lists now that September has come? Chels gifted me some Mexican heather and told me it supposedly sprouts like a madman, so I may have to repot it when it gets bigger but now it looks just fine in my also gifted purple pot on my desk. It's showing to be a lovely day :)

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Left to my own devices, I probably would...

2009-09-11T23:44:00.000-04:00

The Pet Shop Boys show at House Of Blues, Orlando was amazing. Given the fact that my sister and I lived in London around the time they came out, the songs we loved were considered old school to the majority of the people in the pit, but we were up a level and dance and sing at the top of our lungs we all did.

Neil and Chris played almost every song I hoped they would. Heart, Left to my Own Devices, It's a Sin, West End Girls, Suburbia, Two Divided by Zero, Jealousy, New York City Boy, and a whole bunch of other songs we didn't know, but danced to anyway. They also played a cover of Viva La Vida (Coldplay) and it was AMAZING! All in all Neil and Chris played 1.5 hours (not bad for a 55 year old and a 54 year old respectively) and it was worth every penny.

Steals and Deals at the Super Target

2009-09-11T15:50:00.001-04:00

Is there a better store than a Super Target? I don't think so... Not only can I get Isaac Mizrahi there, I can get groceries. In that vein and the fact that I am a coupon crazy, I went shopping.
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Bounce 2 month Dryer Bar(this way I don't buy dryer sheets) 2.24
4 Tide 2x Ultra Single Packs (1 load a piece)4 x 97cents 3.88
4 Reeces Peanut Butter cup 2 in a pack (2 dark choc, 2 Milk) 2.08
2 Loaves of Archer Farms Artisan Sourdough Bread 1.98
5 Archer Farms Artisan baguettes 4.95
2 Healthy Choice Frozen Meals 2.04 each 4.08
1 Can of Edge Infused Shave Gel 2.99
2 RENU eye lubricants for contact lenses 2.64 each 5.28

Total $27.48 before coupons

Bounce Target Coupon 1.50
Bounce Manufacturer Coupon 1.00
4 Tide Mfc 1.oo each 4.00
2 Reeces .52 mfc 1.04
2 Reeces .54 mfc 1.08
7 Artisan Farms Target Coupons 6.93
2 Healthy Choice Mfc 2.00 each 4.00
1 Edge Infused Mfc 2.99 2.99
2 RENU Mfc. 2.00 each 4.00 Total of Coupons used $26.54

Total after Coupons = $.94
Tax .78
Total Paid to Target = $1.72 for $27.48 worth of groceries.

It was a good trip :) Now, off to get ready for The Pet Shop Boys concert tonight.

The taming of the Shrew

2009-09-11T11:59:00.000-04:00

Went to last job and picked up paycheck. Woman made me wait 1/2 an hour even though I had spoken to her on Tuesday and we agreed I would come by today AT 10 to pick it up. She said "Oh, I'd forgotten all about you..." I replied "Well, I'm here now and you've known I was coming all week and if you trusted your administrative staff to do the fantastic job that they do without you screaming at them all the time, your admin could have told you I was on your calander. I'll be here in the lobby while you cut my check." SHREW. As I was leaving, I did speak to coworkers and gave them blessings so they could get through the rest of the day.. This woman was HORRIFIC to deal with micromanaging, shrill, demeaning, etc... that and the fact that after hiring me for a week decided she couldn't fund the position... Yes, I suppose it's a blessing disguise I'm not still there.

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Off to Target - I have a boatload of coupons that will get me most of the stuff for FREE and you know I love me some FREE :)

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ETA: I really am NOT a horrible person like I was in that office today but the way this woman said it "Oh....I'd forgotten all about YOOOOOOUUUUUU..." in that condescending way... I just couldn't let that slide.

Almost The Birthday Weekend

2009-09-10T16:36:00.000-04:00

Got the phone call from Apple One, who is the employment agency I am trying to get work from, that I need to meet with the client on Monday at 9, instead of tomorrow at 10, which works as I have to go to the last job and pick up my check from that one tomorrow. Problem then? I was all stoked about the interview Friday and now I have the whole weekend to stew about it. That and my birthday is Monday, so plans to go to Walt Disney World - Magic Kingdom are shot.

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So, speaking of the birthday weekend... Friday night, my sister, (we'll call her L) and I are seeing THE PET SHOP BOYS at HOB. In the 80's, my sister and Neil (the singer, yes, the one yawning, there...thanks to the record company for such a great photo on the album cover!)had a meeting of the minds on a tube ride in London. She immediately recognized him, he acknowledged that she recognized him and she smiled at him and left him to be. This also happend in Harrods with George Michael of WHAM - my sister - she's like a magnet, I don't know.... This is the way of my sister. She doesn't want bubbles burst. I understand that. You don't want to find out that in real life that people you respect musically are real tools. I respect Mel Gibson as an actor and his choices in roles and genres. But at the end of the day, he's a tool. So no bubble burst, let's just be happy for the music. I mean come on, when's the next time Neil and Chris are going to come to HOB Orlando? Glad we got tickets before Neil's vanity got the best of him...
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Speaking of the $$$$ that I am picking up on Friday, almost 90% of it is going to Chel's tuition bill. The bill itself is only $1600, but I just don't have it. I have been picking at the balance since we got the bill late July but I still have a big chunk of it still to go and live in fear that the college will pull her earnings from her part time job as a lifeguard to go towards the tuition as opposed to her using it for you know, LIVING? I will be the first person to tell you I was not anywhere as near as prepared as I should have been and now I'm paying the price. The other 10%? That would be Groceries.

Clean Slate

2009-09-09T09:12:00.000-04:00

September 9, 2009 marks an important end ... and a beginning. This is what numerologists and astrologists are saying. Apparently, This is the number of completion and finality, but 9 is also the number of sympathy, love, selfless sacrifice and morality. OK then. I'm not a hard core astrology follower but I'll have a look to see whats up now and then. I'm going into this month with positive thoughts that there will be a turn around in a few different areas, if the number 9 wants to come along for that ride, more power to him :)

My horoscope on this apparently significant day says I'm supposed to JUST DO IT, stop talking about it... whatever IT is. Do what’s really important and then keep going. See it through to the end. I know what IT is, I think we all do down deep, we just don't know how to start, or are afraid, or just don't think we can do it. Well, I suppose today, I'll listen to what the oracles have to say, who knows, it can't hurt right? I may be pleasantly surprised where the day, week, rest of the month takes me.

I look forward to the rest of this month like a child waiting on the ice cream truck. It has a lot of potential. What I do with it I guess is how it will grow or fall.

This list is really just for my own good - if I put things in writing I tend to do them with resolve as opposed to just putting them on a back burner.

To do before September is over: Clean Slate!
Get a day job Purge bookshelves Purge CD's
Purge clothes Start treadmill again 3x week
Get back on Points program Purge the Eeyores.
I think that's a large enough list of goals. I have another 22 days - 3 weeks- to accomplish this, I have every faith in me.

Fear and Loathing in the Produce aisle.

2009-09-08T17:14:00.001-04:00

I just found out some of my fave seasonal fruits and veggies are in!

Seasonal Fruits and Vegetables for September: Apples, Blueberries, Broccoli, Cabbage, Carrots, Cauliflower, Cucumber, Garlic, Leeks, Lettuce, New Potatoes, Spinach, Squash, Sweet Corn, of an abundance of freshness! Our local Farmer's Market is every Sunday, but doesn't really get into full swing until late September, early October, I think I'll start taking a looksee soon.

I don't care for many veg and find it difficult to eat them alone, so other than soups, salads and vegetarian lasagna or pasta dishes, as a whole, veg escapes me. I wish it wasn't like that so I am making an effort (ok, so it's really mainly for my waistline) to incorporate more veg in to the diet.

Kicking away, Col

Won't you be my neighbour?

2009-09-08T13:32:00.001-04:00

Come on in, the gate's open. Welcome to the craziness. I have chocolate cake :) Get to know me a little It's not complicated. I'm a foreign service brat, parents traveled here there and everywhere, was in Panama at 6 weeks old, graduated Jr. High in Madrid, Spain; High School in Lima, Peru; lived in London for a few years after that, California, Maryland and now I'm based in Florida. I don't require much. I'm addicted to Diet Coke and I love Orange Popsicles.

The above said child. 18 and at Florida Southern College, studying Biology/Pre-Med. I am trying to get her to think about how to bring Forensic Psychology in there as a minor as she would be brilliant at that, but she wants to work in The Medical Examiner's office (a la Dr. G). Kids, there's no talking to them.

A theatre and band kid throughout her whole high school career, she decided that she wanted the "whole high school experience" her Sr. year and therefore dropped most of her Theatre classes and took up Swimming. Good thing she did because now she lifeguards at the University pool, making some money for herself. You go girl!

She comes home every two weeks or so, (we're an hour away from the college), I think more for me than for her, but I'm not complaining.
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One of my obsessions. Sleeping Beauty (Princess Aurora or Briar Rose- whatever you want to call her) and Prince Phillip at Magic Kingdom, Walt Disney World. I'm thinking about getting a shirt made up that says "PRINCE PHILLIP'S BIT ON THE SIDE" - how do you think that would go down? We live here in Florida, so you'd think I'd have a season pass. I don't but should. I love all things Sleeping Beauty related. I also love WDW :)

This is my passion. I am no more at home than when I am with camera in hand. There is a lot I want to express but wanted to at least give some insight to me.

I love Black and White photography and primarily use it in my portraiture. I shoot digital now and miss the hell out of proper film, but as I don't have a darkroom built in the house, the cost to print, develop etc. can get insane especially as I shoot SO many photos in a sitting. I love to shoot people but have started shooting architecture as well.

Performance is always a fun thing to shoot. I get to see artists I love and they, for the most part, have been happy with the results. It's a win win.

Kicking away, Col

As it was in the Beginning - Live and Create Light

2009-09-08T12:27:00.001-04:00

Live and Create Light.

Pretty intimidating to start out like that, I'd like to think that I can do that on a daily basis. That the life that I live and try to create is giving light to great things. It's a heavy task sometimes.The writer Collete was inspiring and her work relative, she's my namesake and I can only hope to someday be a 1/3rd as carefree as she was. I'm not working a full time job right now (got laid off in November 2007), my photography business - Pocketful of Poses - has been slow, mostly because my head has been focused on getting my 18 year old - Chelsea - in college, but I can't use that as an excuse anymore, she's a month in and by all accounts is doing just fine thank you. So why am I feeling creatively and professionally stagnant?

I have my health for the most part (need to lose a few pounds - but don't we all?), my extended family is doing well. My 42nd birthday is in 6 days ( I know, I don't look a day over 36, right? - LOL ), I have accomplished 3 or 4 things on my list of things to do before I am 45, so I still have some time, but this is a strange feeling and it's getting old quick. So, on to better things This is my first post, it's going to be a journey, but then life always is and

"nothing worth having comes without some
kind of fight, got to kick at the darkness till it bleeds daylight" -
Cockburn

Kicking away - Col